


Tremble and Serve

by Zaniida



Series: Open Chapterfics (MCU) [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Additional Tags to Be Added, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Compliant for The Avengers and previous films, Canon-Divergent for at least Iron Man 3, Gen, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Torture, Lesser of two evils, Mild to Moderate Humiliation, More Swearing Than My Norm, Panic Attacks, Serious Consent Issues, Sex Is Not the Focus Here, Slave Loki (Marvel), accidental abuse, hoo boy did I screw up on canon, thrall collar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2020-09-28 16:15:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20428796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zaniida/pseuds/Zaniida
Summary: I must entrust my brother’s care to you, the note said; Thor had left too quickly to offer any further explanations.Loki lay crumpled at his feet."All right," Tony said at last.  "Guess I own you now."





	1. Arrival

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Marzipanda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marzipanda/gifts), [Lise](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lise/gifts), [Tangerinedream](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tangerinedream/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Things Left Buried](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15855117) by [Marzipanda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marzipanda/pseuds/Marzipanda). 
  * Inspired by [As You Wish](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13752294) by Anonymous. 
  * Inspired by [Tear My Castle Down](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15531240) by [Lise](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lise/pseuds/Lise). 
  * Inspired by [Tony's Thrall](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12188148) by [EndlessStairway](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndlessStairway/pseuds/EndlessStairway). 
  * Inspired by [The Thrall Prince](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16240430) by [kuzibah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuzibah/pseuds/kuzibah). 
  * Inspired by [The Prince in the Tower](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13440951) by [EndlessStairway](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndlessStairway/pseuds/EndlessStairway). 
  * Inspired by [Reconciliation](https://archiveofourown.org/works/647761) by [Tangerinedream](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tangerinedream/pseuds/Tangerinedream). 

> Having read a ton of Magically Compelled Slave Loki fics, most of which I greatly enjoyed, I'm ready to try my own.
> 
> This should be a bit more analytical than most; Tony tries, right from the get-go, to figure out the collar's properties, as opposed to the more usual route of being annoyed and a bit vengeful until Horrible Things happen and he changes his tune. I also wanted to avoid Asgard and to vary from the usual setting (Stark Tower); hence, Tony's Malibu mansion!
> 
> (I haven't watched all the _Iron Man_ films yet. I think I saw the mansion blown up in _Endgame_? Please forgive me not knowing the details of the place, and feel free to point out discrepancies in the comments.)
> 
> This fic will include Sexual Content with Dubious Consent, on account of neither party wants it, but both have to agree to it due to Reasons (lesser of two evils). It's an unavoidable consequence of the collar's design.
> 
> Now, I don't write titillation pieces, so this won't be written in a sexy manner, even in a DubCon way. The fandom is saturated with people writing sexy stuff, so I choose to offer unusual alternatives. You can look to some of my _Person of Interest_ fics (_The Toll_, _Strange Bedfellas_, _The Great Mistake_, the fourth part of [Bargains](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12134205/chapters/28400940), or the big one, _On the Other Side of the Mirror_) to see how I deal with sexual content -- I explore ideas and characterization by use of DubCon and NonCon scenarios, but I never write happy consensual sex scenes, and my DubCon and NonCon scenes are often euphemized (with the character's mind focused on other details), deliberately unsatisfying (because the characters shouldn't be having sex to begin with), or even skipped entirely (taking place offscreen). Or I'll write sensuality without a sexual component.
> 
> This fic contains swearing! As always, when I use swear words, they're to a purpose; I carefully consider each one in context and as part of conveying feelings or ideas in language appropriate to the character who's speaking (or narrating). It is never gratuitous; if I can think of a way to convey the intended thought without swearing, I will do so. I think Tony would swear (at least mentally, possibly verbally as well) when confronted with this sort of situation, and so I write him that way. This also informs which specific swear words I choose.
> 
> * * *
> 
> **Inspiration Fics**
> 
> I haven't yet read all of _The Prince in the Tower_, but these seven were formative in my understanding of the genre (Loki magically compelled to obey an Avenger).
> 
> _Things Left Buried_ and _As You Wish_ have the team, as a whole, trying to deal with the collar's inhumane restrictions; TLB has them mostly trying to do the right thing, AYW has them mostly acting like jerks until they realize just how badly it's been affecting Loki (though that fic has the _delightful_ nuance that Loki's misery is _mostly_ caused by his refusal to actually discuss the problem with them -- he's so irritated by how badly they're handling his care that he acts like an offended girlfriend of the "if you don't know I won't tell you" nonsense that just makes everything worse).
> 
> AYW requires Loki to obey even thoughtless orders, to the letter, or suffer. Many fics have mechanics that hurt Loki if he's given contradictory orders; _Tear My Castle Down_ (ongoing) has this as a feature more than a bug, to the point where Loki repeatedly asks for death instead, and Steve finds it hard to word his commands in a way that _doesn't_ hurt Loki.
> 
> _The Thrall Prince_ (Steve/Loki and pretty sweet) keeps Loki working in order to earn free time (which includes being able to speak his mind). Some of the fics (like TLB and _Tony's Thrall_) won't let Loki follow certain orders until he's "fulfilled his purpose" (of being a sex slave), while _Reconciliation_ (sadly unfinished) affects Loki's very _thoughts_.
> 
> Oh, and TTP has them work out flowcharts so Loki can follow complex commands (because the collar strongly controls his actions), and has Steve give orders almost like a game they play ^_^
> 
> Most of the fics have masters who start as jerks then later come to sympathize with Loki and try to help him. _The Prince in the Tower_ showcases a **much** darker Tony who hurts Loki (both unthinkingly and on purpose) while testing out hypotheses and trying to correct his behavior; I haven't read far enough to really grasp how this works into the plot, though I understand there's a plot reason (but not the most positive ending).
> 
> I expect I'll be weaving in details from all of these, with no recollection of which ideas came from where (aside from the big memorable ones). They're all quite intriguing takes on this genre.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor dumps Loki on Tony's pool deck, hands Tony a couple things, and flies off again.
> 
> Tony isn't particularly happy with this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So… turns out that not having seen the _Iron Man_ second and third films has left me creating a fic that can't exist in the canon timeline (because things I have referenced in this fic conflict with the Malibu mansion actually being intact). So we're now in AU territory! This fic treats _Avengers_ as canon, along with _Iron Man_ and _Thor_, but other films, in whole or in part, may or may not be canon for this fic -- it depends on where I go with the idea.
> 
> **Content Warnings:** This chapter is a relatively tame setup, but still describes signs that Loki's been tortured, a bunch of hypothesizing about who hurt him and why, and a collar that in some fashion controls Loki's actions (the mechanics get explored in later chapters).
> 
> Also, for emetophobes, Tony feels like throwing up (through at least two chapters, off and on) but doesn't actually throw up. I'll warn if he does.

“Whoa, whoa whoa whoa. Thor—”

“I will return when I am able.”

“—you can’t  
just  
aaaaand he’s gone.” Tony stared at Thor’s fluttering cape as it faded into the California heatwaves. “Fuck.”

Which left Tony standing there in a Speedo, holding a folded piece of parchment and an alien device. With a crumpled lump of nearly naked godling at his feet.

Might be _fully_ naked, in fact: Tony couldn’t spot even a hint of clothing, only the collar and the shackles and the thin, delicate chains that connected them.

When Thor had unceremoniously dumped his brother on the pool deck, Loki had, instantly and without even looking up, arranged himself into a truly uncomfortable kneeling position that must be murder on his knees. He’d bent forward, arms outstretched as if in supplication, forehead pressed to the tiles as though the weight of the collar was too much for his emaciated body to bear.

Since then, he hadn’t made any attempt to move, or even to speak. The rise and fall of his back, that was it—breath after breath, with occasional bouts of raspy coughing.

Along his sides, the flesh was striped with angry red marks, thicker than any whip mark Tony had ever seen. (To be fair, Tony’s experience with whips was limited to sex dungeons. Maybe you needed a thicker whip to hurt nigh-invincible Asgardians.) Beneath that layer were older stripes, faded scars from previous rounds of the same treatment. Fresh bruises ran up Loki’s arms, some of the skin cracked and bleeding. His hair was a tangled, matted mess that reached halfway down his back, obscuring the worst of the damage; part of it seemed stuck in the wounds. And he was so thin that every rib stood out.

Whatever Tony might have felt toward Loki—rage, hate, terror, triumph—dissolved in the face of the pitiful figure bowed at his feet. Filthy, beaten, starved, and helpless… there was no excuse for this. Tony didn’t abide torture.

_Asgard_ seemed to be fine with torture, if this was Loki’s duly appointed punishment. But was it? Who exactly had hurt him? The pattern of abuse couldn’t be a few malcontents, unless Loki had been captured and held for weeks. But then, Earth was no stranger to prison abuse, so it wasn’t fair to lay the blame on all of Asgard.

Of course, Earth didn’t have the kind of surveillance that Asgard did. Thor had mentioned an all-seeing gatekeeper, and indicated that his father, Odin, also had many ways to keep track of affairs throughout his kingdom. Surely they would have looked in on Loki a time or two. Had Odin not cared about his son’s welfare? Or had he laid the sentence out himself?

God, he hoped that Thor hadn’t been involved. Forced to whip his own brother? Or, worse, _not_ forced—maybe corporal punishment was more acceptable in the Realm Eternal. Maybe Thor had considered it a useful way to get Loki back on the right track.

Tony closed his eyes for a moment, taking deep breaths and fighting down the bile that rose in his throat.

Back on the helicarrier, Tony’s little spy program had pulled not only all the computer contents, but security footage from the entire floating fortress. Later, he’d had JARVIS review the footage and track down any clips of his new allies. Thor had briefly discussed the issue with Fury, and shot down the idea of torturing Loki… but only because he didn’t think it would _work_.

_There's no pain would prise his need from him_, Thor had said; the odd phrasing had stuck in Tony’s head. So was Thor okay with torture, just not for interrogation?

Actually, how did Thor _know_ that Loki wouldn’t bend to torture, unless he’d seen Loki tortured before?

That was not the most comfortable thought.

Unfolding the parchment, Tony found a hastily scrawled note… in runic letters, some form of cursive, written with a calligraphy pen or (he could just picture it) a quill. In a language that Tony didn’t even recognize, yet had no trouble understanding, and the very _idea_ of that was giving him a headache.

_Truly sorry, no time; I must entrust my brother’s care to you.  
Touch device to collar and claim him; he must obey and cannot do harm_.

Tony rubbed a hand over his face and groaned.

_Claim him_. So Tony now held the leash. Why Tony? Why not, the universe loved to toy with him.

_Must obey_. At the whim of the one who held his leash, then—not that Tony was taking that control for granted. Still, Loki’s current condition had come at the whims of his previous captors. Which likely meant that Loki had to shut up and take it.

_Cannot do harm_. More like _cannot fight back_.

Again, Tony fought down the urge to throw up. He tried to focus on the wording: _Entrust my brother’s care_. Okay, that was a bit more to unpack.

Despite the whole invasion, and Thor’s crack about Loki being adopted, Thor still considered them brothers. First point.

Thor trusted Tony to handle this, without any advance notice. Second point. Tony’s feelings about that were… hard to pin down. He could recall being furious at Loki, and terrified of him, and feeling triumphant (and still pissed) when they’d finally brought him down, sent him up to Asgard in chains. But the deranged invader who’d thrown Tony head-first through a plate-glass window was hard to reconcile with the victim of Asgard’s ‘justice system’.

Torture wasn’t _justice_, and it didn’t serve the purpose of keeping the innocent safe. Might do the opposite, really: If Loki got free, he might be even _more_ destructive, for revenge. Or because the torture had unhinged a mind that hadn’t been too stable to begin with.

And, realistically, Loki was _going_ to get free. Assuming that the enlightened courts of Asgard wouldn’t consider execution, that left imprisonment (boredom) or slavery (resentment). A bored, resentful trickster god of mischief is going to find the flaw in his containment; you can’t keep him captive forever. So you need some other way to neutralize the threat.

And Thor had emphasized _care_, not _captivity_. Third point. As if Loki’s captivity was never in question. Which was odd, seeing as he’d removed his brother from Asgard (which had access to _magic_) and dumped him next to Tony’s Malibu mansion (the house with the least ability to secure a dangerous prisoner). It felt like Thor trusted the shackles (or the collar) to keep Loki in line.

Again, Tony wasn’t taking that for granted. And Loki would eventually win free, and they’d be back to square one. Unless Tony could somehow persuade him to take a different path.

Dammit, he’d come to Malibu to get away from all the pressure; he hadn’t signed up to be a prison warden, let alone a damn _shrink_.

Besides, even his best friends wouldn’t trust Tony Stark with this kind of responsibility. On his _best_ days he was self-centered, easily angered, erratic verging on volatile. Not to mention frequently caught up in projects to the point of losing track of the world for days on end.

And if any of the Avengers could live up to the name, it was Tony. Tony Stark did not turn the other cheek, and his love for women and cars was _nothing_ compared to the thrill he felt from seeing a jerkass get his comeuppance.

He’d had JARVIS make him an infinite loop of Loki getting thrashed by the Hulk; the audio alone was fun, just the smashing and the panicked gasps and more smashing and the Hulk’s slowly receding footsteps—_puny god_—and Loki’s battered little whine. A useful antidote to Tony’s nightmares, and the whine made him grin; it was all the fun of watching _Jackass_, while knowing that the guy getting pummeled was going to walk it off without even a trip to the hospital. Guilt-free and satisfying, because the guy who invaded New York had _richly_ deserved it.

Besides, by targeting Stark Tower, Loki had made it personal. On purpose, _specifically_ to piss Tony off.

_That was the plan_.

_Not a great plan_, Tony had said, running on hope and adrenaline more than assurance. But now it seemed prophetic: It had brought Loki here, helpless, collapsed at his feet.

But why had Thor brought him _here_? To the care of a man who loathed him, on a planet full of enemies? Maybe Thor was still thinking of Earth as a playground—_mostly harmless_—but if SHIELD got wind of Loki’s return, they’d stop at nothing to get their hands on an Asgardian test subject (and they likely weren’t the only ones). At least on Asgard, he’d been out of their reach.

_No time_, the note had said. And Thor’s last words—almost his _only_ words—had been “_I will return when I can_.” Which suggested one of two things: Either Asgard was under attack (_what else would Thor prioritize over the care of his heavily damaged brother?_ ) or… Thor needed Loki’s presence here to be a secret, and was trying to throw Asgard off the scent.

Maybe Thor was well aware of the danger, and still had to trust Tony to take care of him. Because prospects on the other Realms would be even worse. Which meant that he was on his own, for the moment, and the letter was all the explanation or instructions that he was going to get until Thor returned.

For a long moment, Tony stared at the device in his hand. It was fitted for a hand, like a gun grip, only ringed with gold. At the top was a sliver of gem, a very light blue.

He was tempted to just chuck the thing into the pool.

Loki’s coughing interrupted his thoughts, and drew him back to Thor’s words: _I must trust you to take care of my brother. I will return when I can_.

Fuck.

Thor better be right about the rest of it—about Loki not being able to harm him. Because Tony was no match for Loki without his armor, and like hell he’s spending a Malibu vacation suited up inside his own goddamn house.

“All right,” Tony said, letting his irritation overpower his fear as he walked up to stand before Loki’s bowed head. “Guess I own you now.”

Loki didn’t so much as twitch.

But when Tony pushed aside Loki’s hair (confirming his suspicions about how extensive the damage was), the godling started trembling, almost violently. Tony studied him for a moment, wondering if that was anger or fear or pain. Or the expectation of pain.

Whatever the case, Loki didn’t move, or even make a sound.

Touching the device to the back of the collar, Tony gathered his courage and intoned, “I, Tony Stark, hereby claim Loki of Asgard. God help us all.”

The gem on the device glowed brightly for a moment before fading away into darkness, as if it had run out of power.

“All right,” Tony said again, stepping back a few paces. “You can stand up.”

Loki didn’t move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alt Title: _Sherlock Tony_ (Sherlock Stark?). Or _Yet Another Thrall Collar Loki Fic_, or _Collared in Cali_, or _The Malibu Thrall_, but they're all too frivolous for the tone I want to set.
> 
> **Tangerinedream:** I remain astounded by your creativity in _Reconciliation_, and I am beyond sorry that those jerks drove you away before you could polish it up and let that story really shine. After a gap of five years, it's unlikely that you'll be in the right headspace to pick up the story again, but I hope you've moved on to a creative endeavor that suits where you are now, and that has attracted more positive feedback and less negative feedback. You were talented at 17 and I would love to someday see how far you've come since then.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Opening new fics while my old fics aren't even finished? Am I biting off more than I can chew yet? Definitely. This is but one of a dozen or more ideas that I've got for Loki fics where I don't yet know how the whole fic is going to go. Pile that on top of my unfinished POI fics and that's a good couple dozen fics to work on, not even counting the fics in other fandoms or the non-fic projects I've got going as well.
> 
> Don't expect updates to be soon, or in any decent order; at the moment, I'm letting the Muse lead me around by the nose, and only fighting _a little_ to get some priority fics updated alongside these others. But then, I've only been in the Loki fandom for, what, like half a year? Still in the blush of youth.
> 
> Now, if you've got a preference as to which fic gets updated faster than the rest, you can make your preference known in the comments. Or, if you'd like me to pay even more attention to your vote, consider filling my [July Prompt](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19431457)! It's mostly there to encourage people to get creative outside the media they're used to -- to stretch outside your comfort zone and see what you come up with -- but anyone who fills that prompt before Halloween gets to vote on up to three fics that I'll bump to the top of my priority list. (If you happen to fill before my birthday (August 31st), you get twice the number of votes.) In addition, Loki fans who fill my prompt can ask me for a sneak peek of my upcoming fics! I'll give you a rundown of the ideas I've been working on and maybe some preview snippets as well, and you can weigh in on which fics you'd like to see posted before the rest.
> 
> And with that, I'm off to see what else the Muse wants me to work on!


	2. Limitations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That’s a command, by the way. In case you thought it was just a suggestion. Don’t like being given orders, do you? But you can’t resist forever. Your brother said you have to obey me, so… why are you fighting it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what it is, but writing in past tense feels weird lately. Especially in situations where a character is slowly trying to figure something out, it feels like present tense is more natural, better conveys what's going on. Hence the switch to present tense here. I imagine it'll stay that way for at least a few chapters, likely the rest of the fic; I might go back and switch the first chapter to present tense, or I might leave it that way as the intro (which feels more introspective).
> 
> **Content Warnings:** We get to see more of the marks of torture on Loki's body; the description is mildly graphic. No sexual content yet, though there's nakedness (no details). Pretty much everything else is par for the course with a magical slave collar setup, so I feel no need to specifically warn for it here.

_Touch device to collar and claim him; he must obey and cannot do harm_.

_I, Tony Stark, hereby claim Loki of Asgard. God help us all_.

“Loki. Stand up,” Tony says again, a little louder.

The only change is Loki’s breaths speeding up.

“On your feet,” Tony says. “That’s a command, by the way. In case you thought it was just a suggestion. I assume your ears still work, so be a good little godling and stand the fuck up.”

The trembles get stronger, not just visible but audible in Loki’s shuddering breaths. His arms are still outstretched toward Tony, his forehead still pressed to the tiles.

What’s wrong with this picture?

Narrowing his eyes, Tony stalks over and grabs a chair, then plops it down facing Loki. With perhaps a bit too much space between them, but he’s not about to put himself within easy reach of the guy. Sitting on the edge, he leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees, studying his new charge as if he could divine the answer just by looking at him.

_He must obey_. Yeah, but how does that work, exactly? Does the collar physically control his body? Because if that’s the case, it clearly isn’t working.

Unless it’s the _claiming ritual_ that didn’t work. But if he did something wrong, then why did the device react? And if there was more to the claiming ritual than just intentions and words, then Thor should’ve been a _bit_ more clear with the instructions.

Well, if the claiming ritual hasn’t worked, there isn’t a lot that Tony can do. So he’ll start with the assumption that it has. So… is Loki fighting the collar? Deliberately trying not to obey? Is he strong enough to do that?

Then again, maybe he physically _can’t_ obey? He doesn’t seem to be making any _effort_ to obey, but… did they cripple him? Is he bound?

Before he can think twice, Tony gets up and walks around Loki, looking him over more carefully while staying out of arm’s reach. But there doesn’t seem to be anything physically preventing him from getting up; his feet are intact (if somewhat bruised), and his legs don’t seem broken or bleeding. And he moved earlier, right? He got into that position to begin with.

Tony scowls. “Don’t like being given orders, do you?” he says, going with his first hypothesis. “But you sure had fun _giving_ them, the last time you were on earth. _Kneel_. That was you, righ—”

When Loki pushes himself up, Tony backpedals so fast that he trips over his own feet and falls, one hand splashing into the pool, scraping the underside of his arm and landing hard on his ribcage. For a moment he lies there, stunned, before he scrambles to get his feet under him and turn, ready to—

Loki is still in the same place, but kneeling now, legs folded underneath him, hands on his thighs, head bowed. Still trembling, though less than before.

Is he on _Candid Camera_ ? The god of mischief, kneeling on his pool deck, just because he said _kneel_ ? He hadn’t even meant it as an order, just quoting what Loki had said that night in Stuttgart. But the collar must have forced the issue, because he can’t imagine Loki kneeling of his own free will.

Well, one question answered. Or part of one, at least. Tony has (probably) claimed him correctly, and Loki is (in some fashion) forced to obey his commands.

Of course, he still hasn’t gotten to his feet.

“Oookay,” Tony drawls, gingerly getting to his feet, and walks back to his chair, wincing a little at the pain in his ribs and his wrist. He turns and plops himself down with a sigh, and looks at—

Yeah, okay, _fully_ naked, great. As curious as Tony has been about the differences between human and Asgardian anatomy, he could’ve gone his whole life without seeing what Loki’s dick looked like.

But that isn’t really the detail that draws his eye… and turns his stomach.

The marks on Loki’s back look like someone just went to town with a whip, or maybe a stick—thick, layered marks, some form of punishment. The marks on Loki’s front are more… calculated. Artistic. Like someone took a thin, sharp blade and spent a couple of hours with Loki’s flesh as their canvas.

The curves are smooth, not jagged; he wasn’t struggling at the time. It’d be nice to think he’d been asleep, but the real explanation is obvious enough: The collar kept him still as someone carved him up.

More than a few times. The design is built up through multiple layers of scars, over Loki’s chest and belly, thighs and upper arms, even his face. And whatever the design is, it’s not finished.

Tony’s suspicion that Thor might be involved vanishes, because Thor could never be that patient, that methodical. Even to stand aside, and let someone do such a thing to his brother? Maybe Thor’s hasty departure was less about keeping Asgard off Loki’s scent, and more about dealing with the aftermath of whatever he’s done to Loki’s captor. It couldn’t have been pretty.

Or maybe he found his brother alone, flew off to place him in protective custody, and went back to find the guy and show him what happens when a god of thunder gets his righteous fury on.

Tony doesn’t disapprove. He’s felt that rage before, after the death of Yinsen, and then, again, looking at Killian after Pepper had fallen into the flames. There’s a point where violence is justified, and there’s a point where a person can become the living agent of divine retribution, and when that role has fallen to him, he’s never held back. Never felt any regret, either; some people _deserve_ to burn.

Loki had been _contained_. If you’re magically compelled to hold still even for torture, then you’re not a threat anymore. So if Thor decides to smash a few heads over this, Tony’s right there with him.

Once Tony can see past the rage and focus on anything other than the scars, he notices other details. The total lack of body hair, for one. More bruises, mostly on the arms but also around the stomach. Loki’s skinny frame is even more noticeable now, and Tony was right about being able to count the ribs.

And, of course, there’s the collar: three gems glowing a sickly green, surrounded by etched designs. One more piece of the puzzle, and he’s gotta figure this out if he’s got any chance of doing right by Loki.

“Well… you can move,” Tony observes, pushing back the nausea. “That’s something to work with. So… why not stand up? You can’t like kneeling more than standing, unless there’s something wrong with your feet. Can’t be modesty, because you’re no less exposed.”

For a moment, he chews his lip, considering. He’s not getting the full data here, not just because Loki’s not talking to him, but also because he can’t see Loki’s face, judge his reactions. A few shudders and breathing patterns aren’t nearly enough to go by.

“Hey,” he says, sharply. “Look at me when I’m talking to you.”

Loki shudders, but keeps his eyes down.

The gems get a little brighter.

“Fine, then. Explain the collar to me. Tell me what I’m working with.”

The shudders get more pronounced, the gems brighter still. Loki’s face, still averted, is scrunched up, and when Tony ducks his head a bit for a better look, he sees that the eyes are squeezed shut, the expression twisted with pain.

“It’s hurting you, right?” Tony hazards. “Come on, you can’t resist forever. Your brother said you have to obey me, so… why are you fighting it? Tell me what the collar does. Tell me how to use it.”

It’s disturbing, watching Loki just kneel there and shake. And the gems are glowing with the ugliest shade of green that Tony has ever seen.

“You already obeyed me once,” Tony says. “What’s so hard about the rest of it? It’s not like I’m asking you to drink poison or run a marathon. Hell, if you can’t walk, go ahead and crawl, just _something_.”

And then he sits there, mouth agape, as Loki leans over and slowly approaches him on hands and knees, still trembling, the gems dimming as he moves. Before he can quite get in range, Tony barks out “_Stop!_ ” and Loki stops, then settles back into a kneel, face still downcast like before.

_Too close_, Tony’s whole body is screaming at him, and he can feel his breath and heart rate speed up, but he holds his ground. He’s starting to get a feel for this, and the possibilities are… worrisome.

Loki isn’t the kind of person to crawl or kneel, so that’s definitely the collar forcing him to do so. If it’s not direct control (because he hasn’t obeyed Tony’s command to stand up, or look at Tony, or explain things), then… how do you get a god to do what you want? Reward or punishment, right? And Tony can’t think of any sort of reward that would get Loki to follow humiliating commands, especially if he resisted the less humiliating ones.

So that thing is probably a magical _shock collar_. And if Loki obeys humiliating commands to avoid getting hurt, then…

Maybe the collar isn’t _letting_ him obey.

Maybe the collar is hurting Loki for not obeying commands that it _won’t let him obey_.

Tony’s blood runs cold.

“Stop!” he blurts. “All commands canceled. Stop everything.”

Like a puppet cut from its strings, Loki collapses down to the position he’d been in to begin with, shuddery breaths turning into a coughing jag. But he still stretches out his arms towards Tony, and sinks down until his shaking forehead touches the tiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Recommended Fics:** [As You Say](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12233451/chapters/27793074) by LilyAnson (ongoing), [Possession](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1406920/chapters/2951485) by Oudemia, and [Screaming Mute and Seeing Blind](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1669952/chapters/3545090) by Nonymos
> 
> These fics deal with the tortures that the magic effect creates if Loki refuses to obey, or otherwise fails to meet the criteria required for "compliance." They can get pretty rough.
> 
> Both AYS and _Possession_ torture Loki if he's not fast enough at obeying commands. AYS uses his own blocked magic to cause immense pain he'll do almost anything to avoid, but it triggers if he can't quickly figure out what the command requires of him (e.g. "Move!"). _Possession_ works like a seizure, and triggers even if he's desperately trying to obey but is physically incapable of it (e.g. drugged and weak and can't get into bed fast enough). AYS also tortures him if his master is particularly upset, which turns out to be a bad combo with a traumatized Tony who suffers nightmares, flashbacks, and panic attacks, and is severely lacking in self-control. (The level of "master is upset" required to trigger the effect seems a bit inconsistent. Also, Loki has his own panic attacks to deal with, which brings Tony onto his side pretty quickly.)
> 
> SMaSB is the most barbaric: If Loki resists commands, or gets more than half a mile from his captor (Clint Barton), the rune on his face will start burning and won't stop until either he's in compliance again or it's burnt straight through his head and killed him (over the course of several hours). _Plus_, because Odin is such a dick in this one, there are two additional effects. You recall in _Harry Potter_ how Professor Umbridge had him write lines that scored the letters into the flesh of his hand? Well, it's like both parts of that. Every morning and evening, Loki has to say (or write) "I must not tell lies," or the rune will torture him until he complies. And any time he displays unbecoming behavior, the judgment ("INSOLENT," "REBELLIOUS," "LIAR") gets cut into the flesh of his arms. Bear in mind that these are _Odin's_ judgments, so he can be telling the truth and still get "LIAR" if it doesn't match with Odin's assessment of reality.
> 
> (The fact that Odin is a merciless dickhead and Thor isn't much better leads to Clint eventually siding with Loki and the two of them bucking the whole messed-up system. The ending isn't as pat and pretty as a lot of these fics, but still, on balance, it's a positive one. Oh, and the fic itself is far more action-adventure than any other slave!Loki fic I've read.)
> 
> Both _Possession_ and AYS deal with rape recovery. In AYS, they were part of his "slave training," just to break him down (though it turns out the guards were acting beyond their orders); in _Possession_, Loki was given over to two masters before Steve, and the first one tortured him kinda scientifically, while the other raped him and used the collar to force him to beg for it (Loki is traumatized enough that he tries multiple ways to kill himself).
> 
> Also, in AYS, he was brutally tortured as a way to destroy his magic until it was weak enough for them to block it entirely. Oh, and Tony really hates to be called "Master," or even "Sir," which leads to repeated friction between them as Loki tries to overcome the knee-jerk reaction that got trained into him via torture.
> 
> * * *
> 
> I should be starting to marathon some SCP entries (and stories) in preparation for really getting back into _Hidden Things_. However, I'd still like to post a couple of my Loki updates before I drop everything for Creepyfest.
> 
> If you have any suggestions for Loki [one-shots](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Standalone) that are creepy, spooky, scary, chilling, or otherwise suitable for telling around the campfire on Halloween, by all means bring them up in the comments! I haven't yet decided on an idea for my Loki Creepyfest piece, aside from not duplicating my previous genre choices (so no SCP Foundation (how would that even work in a world of superheroes?) and no Cosmic Horror / Eldritch Abomination / Lovecraftian genre).
> 
> I'd consider a crossover with WtNV, except that I think I'd get too involved in the worldbuild and end up biting off more than I can chew (again). And I'd really not like to see Creepyfest turn into year-long Scheherazade tales (where each October I finish one and start a new one), so let's try to keep the idea simple and short(ish).


	3. First Exchange

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _If Loki could talk, then Loki could explain what he knew, and Tony would have an accurate base on which to build. But the device won’t let Loki communicate_.
> 
> _Or… will it? Does it stop Loki from communicating, or just stop him from using his voice?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't see any specific need for content warnings. The chapter talks around a disturbing content for a bit, but doesn't directly mention it, and nothing seriously bad happens.
> 
> Updated chapter slightly because I'd totally forgotten to include Loki's coughing, which is kinda important for this progression.

For a long moment, Tony can’t even think, too caught up in the awareness that he’d been torturing Loki without even meaning to.

_Probably_. It fits all the data so far.

Tony Stark, self-proclaimed genius, philanthropist, defender of the vulnerable, advocate for the weak. Can’t even realize when he’s torturing a guy.

“God,” he says finally, shakily vaulting to his feet. “How is this even going to work? You can’t talk to me, can’t look at me, can’t even stand up…” He starts pacing. “How am I supposed to take care of you if you have to crawl everywhere? What else won’t it let you do? Who the _fuck_ designs a slave collar that _won’t let the slave follow orders??_ ”

If Loki knows the answer, he obviously can’t convey it.

The silence stretches long as Tony struggles with outrage and sympathy and fear. He didn’t want to feel sympathy for Loki, but he can’t help it. He doesn’t want to hurt Loki any further, but he couldn’t help _that_, either, and if he’s going to stumble his way through the collar’s restrictions then he’s just going to hurt him again.

“Damn that guy anyway,” Tony mutters, low. “Dumping you here without an instruction manual. So much heart, never enough _brains_.”

Perhaps it’s his imagination, but Loki huffs at that. Just once, and then he stiffens, his breath catching, and he’s coughing and shaking again, maybe a little more than before.

Huh.

“Well, Puppet Boy, it just so happens that I don’t _need_ an instruction manual. I’m Tony Stark; I built an arc reactor from scratch in the desert and invented a new element out of pure _frustration_. If I can’t puzzle this out, I might as well retire from being a genius.”

Pursing his lips, he pulls his chair a little closer to Loki and sits back down.

“Okay. Revisit the base assumptions. Maybe I don’t even have the foundation right.”

He digs out the note and opens it again.

_Truly sorry, no time; I must entrust my brother’s care to you_.  
_Touch device to collar and claim him; he must obey and cannot do harm_.

_He must obey_.

Except the damn collar won’t _let_ him obey.

Maybe it’s not a slave collar at all; maybe it’s a flat-out torture device. So maybe it’s not controlling his actions after all. Maybe… maybe Loki really did choose to kneel, and crawl, because it was all he could do, because it would stop _part_ of the pain.

That’s not functionally distinct from a device that forces him to crawl, and which punishes him if he resists. Not a useful counter-hypothesis.

And it can’t be completely blocking Loki from serving his purpose; what would be the point in that?

If Loki could talk, then Loki could explain what he knew, and Tony would have an accurate base on which to build. But the device won’t let Loki communicate.

Or… will it? Does it stop Loki from communicating, or just stop him from using his voice?

“Loki,” Tony says sharply, and Loki flinches but doesn’t move. “If you can’t talk can you at least raise your thumbs for me?”

There’s a pause, and then Loki’s fingers curl slightly, all except his middle fingers.

Tony can’t help but laugh at that one, feeling a bit giddy with a combination of fear and unexpected triumph. “Oh, good, you’re still in there!”

Then his momentary pleasure vanishes as Loki convulses, hands going flat and breaths coming fast again.

Shortly, once Loki’s body relaxes a little, Tony sucks in a breath. “Okay, that was clearly a punishment. Was that for trying to communicate? Or… did it punish you for dissing me?”

No answer.

“Well… I hope this won’t hurt you, but: If it will allow you to raise your thumbs, then give me a thumbs-up, okay?”

No movement.

“How about just… just wiggle your thumbs?”

Loki’s thumbs wiggle slowly, and Tony might be imagining it, but the act feels resentful.

“That’s a start. You can’t raise your hands, can you? It won’t let you. If… if I’m right, wiggle your right thumb.”

The right thumb hesitates, then wiggles in an odd pattern. Unsure? Not exactly the right answer? Hmm.

“Well, if that’s what we’ve got to work with, let’s try right thumb for _yes_ or _correct_, left thumb for _no_ or _incorrect_. Do you understand?”

Right thumb.

Now for a question with a clear negative answer: “Can you stand up?”

Left thumb.

Tony grins: _Communication established_.

“Great. We’re getting somewhere. Okay, so… priorities. I assume the… I’m gonna call it ‘the collar’, even though I don’t know exactly which parts are doing what, but… I assume that the collar is forcing you into that position. Am I right?”

Right thumb: _Yes_.

“And it doesn’t look like the most comfortable position, but we’ll have to deal with that later. Is the collar hurting you right now?”

Left thumb: _No_.

“Um… did the claiming work? Are you under my authority?”

Brief hesitation, then: _Yes_.

Loki’s body looks about as rigid and sullen as it is possible to look while crumpled into a confining kneel.

“The collar forces you to obey me?”  
_Yes_.

“It punishes you if you don’t obey me?”

_Yes_, Loki's thumb says, as he fights back more coughs.

“It won’t let you talk, but if I order you to talk, it punishes you anyway?”  
_Yes_.

Confirmation that whoever designed this thing was a sadist. Tony wonders how much Thor understands about how the collar works.

“Seems like it won’t let you stand up, talk, or look at me. Is that correct?”  
_Yes_.

“But you’re allowed to crawl and kneel?”  
_Yes_.

“Is there a way to allow you greater freedom of movement?”

Right thumb, slowly. _Yes_.

Hmm.

“Something that I need to do?”

Hesitation, then right thumb, in that odd pattern again.

“Something that _you_ need to do?”

Right thumb, odd pattern.

“Something that… that you need to do _for_ me?”

Right thumb, basic wiggle.

Hmmmm.

“Okay, so… there’s something that you can do for me that would get you your voice back. Yes?”

A long hesitation, then the right thumb wiggles, slowly, and trembling just slightly.

“But you haven’t done it yet. Now, I haven’t known you that long, but I’d swear you’re too much in love with the sound of your own voice to stay silent willingly. So either it’s something bad… maybe humiliating… or, more likely, you can’t do it until the collar lets you, which probably means that I have to order it. Am I right so far?”

_Yes_.

“Is it harmful?”

Hesitant _No_.

“Humiliating?”  
_Yes_.

The fact that Loki’s naked is taking on a bit more relevance. Exactly what kind of slave _is_ he?

“Is it something you would want to do?”

Left thumb, but more hesitant than Tony expected, and then Loki starts coughing again.

“Something you don’t want to do, but the trade-off is worth it?”

Right thumb, kinda hesitant.

“Is it something that I would like you to do?”

A long moment, then both thumbs waggle in opposition to each other.

“You don’t know if I would like it?”  
_Yes_.

“You think I _might_ like it?”  
_Yes_.

“But you also think I might _not_ like it?”  
_Yes_.

“Would it get your voice back permanently?”  
_No_.

“But long enough to be worth it?”

Loki coughs a few times, and then gives a hesitant _Yes_.

“Is it something that would hurt you?”

A long hesitation, and then both thumbs, waggling: _Maybe_.

“It doesn’t _have_ to hurt you, but it might?”  
_Yes_.

“Would the pain be worth it?”

Both thumbs, but the right more energetically than the left: _Probably_.

Tony briefly envies his manual dexterity.

“And if you don’t do it, you have to stay like that?”  
_Yes_.

“Are there other restrictions? Um, I mean… besides not being able to stand up, or talk, or look at me, are there other things that you can’t do while you’re like this?  
_Yes_.

“Is there…” He hesitates, wondering how to phrase this. “I’m wondering if it’s one specific thing that you need to do, or a variety of things that fall under the same basic nature. Is it one specific thing?”

Left thumb, odd pattern: _Not exactly_.

“So you can fill this requirement in different ways?”  
_Yes_.

“And some of the ways you could do it are smaller, or shorter, or less troubling, than other possible ways?”

Hesitant _Yes_.

Tony runs his hand over his face, takes a couple of deep breaths, and casts his eyes heavenward for a moment, as if asking forgiveness in advance for where this is going.

“All right… I think I’ve been beating around the bush for long enough. Loki… of the tasks you could perform that’ll let you start talking again, whatever the smallest and least troubling task is, go ahead and do it.”

It takes all the courage Tony has to stay still long enough to confirm his hypothesis, as Loki gets up and crawls forward, fighting off more coughs, and then, eyes still downcast, bends down and kisses the top of Tony’s foot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That _might_ be it for this until January, or I might end up updating this a bit while procrastinating on other projects. But it's nearly September, which means I really need to start on my Creepyfest work (and my friend's daughter's birthday story). Again, if you have any ideas for creepy Loki one-shot fics, point 'em out in the comments! I still haven't decided what to do to poor Loki during October =^_^=
> 
> A couple more recommendations to tide you over: [Brought to Justice](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14359062/chapters/33145146) by DictionaryWrites, [Slaves Don't](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16277444/chapters/38065451) by SparkCatcher, and [A new way of life](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16625996/chapters/38997761#workskin) by Devilschild666. Normally I wouldn't recommend the latter two, because they're only a few chapters in and haven't been updated in a year, but hey, they've got some interesting nuances and it's quite possible that they're only on hiatus.
> 
> _Slaves Don't_ has the intriguing idea of Loki being magically bound to whoever hates him most, which turns out to be Tony Stark -- it's quite a dark beginning to the tale, with Tony and Thor both portrayed as violent and a serious threat to Loki. There's also bits where Loki is in sensory deprivation (blindfold, earplugs, and even a gag). But here's the real interesting part:
>
>> Slaves must remain in the household of their masters every night, and could not spend extended amounts of time away, even during the day. If he left Master's house, the spell would first punish him, and then kill him if he did not return. 
> 
> ...which is pretty strict, even more strict than the spatial tie to Barton in _Screaming Mute and Seeing Blind_.
> 
> _A new way of life_ is "gonna get graphic and brutal," says the writer, and it does have rape flashbacks. But the part about it that I found interesting was where Loki runs into Tony, knocking him over, and is terrified of the consequences (though Tony just brushes it off as an accident -- a benefit of the doubt that is lacking in some other Tonys I've read). Loki getting distracted enough to do something to his master that could be construed as a threat, that intrigues me.
> 
> _Brought to Justice_, now, is a complete fic, and I'm partway through and loving it. The master is Steve, who actually makes use of orders from the get-go, and orders that make sense:
>
>> "…as a rule, don’t manipulate people, don’t try to set them up to fight each other, and stop saying stuff just to make people uncomfortable. Do not hurt anybody. Do not engender a situation in which you technically are not the person hurting them, but they become hurt as a result of the situation you made."
> 
> That's part of a longer section, as Steve ensures that Loki will not harm others or himself, even via loophole, and won't take some of the easiest methods of screwing up his situation here.
> 
> Loki does have a much better life in BtJ, with access to his magic (under much less constraint than I've seen in other slave fics), the freedom to enjoy the use of his magic (e.g. to upgrade his room, to travel places, to heal himself, etc.), more freedom to live his life (even to the point of getting dates), and so on. Steve does not mess around when it comes to possible harm (even to Loki himself), but he otherwise lets Loki live his life, while positioning him to become part of the Avengers, at first as a behind-the-scenes healer, but later coming out in a press conference as a full-fledged member of the team. It feels a bit less like slavery than other fics… although there's a point where Steve gets troubled by Loki's potential sex life and strong-arms him into having The Talk with Tony to make sure he's not using sex to deliberately hurt himself. (Steve doesn't do this himself because he acknowledges that he's out of touch with modern sensibilities and LGBT lifestyles and such.)
> 
> As I find new fics that give me interesting ideas, I'm likely going to post links here, two or three at a time. Just because there's such a marvelous variety ^.^
> 
> Also: "Puppet Boy" comes from [this vid](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFNorHpuPag) by Rudy Coby, the Coolest Magician on Earth. If you ever see a pair of scientist characters named "Ruby" and "Cody" in my work, I'll finally have found a place to add that cameo/homage ^_^


	4. Time Constraints

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“The collar incentivizes correct behavior. If I use my freedom to act in a way unbecoming to a slave, I will quickly lose the privilege. If I wish to make use of the full time, I will, mmm, behave myself.” There’s a curl of dark amusement to the way he says it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warnings in End Note.
> 
> Y'know, generally I try to stick close to the canon timeline, choose a place within canon where my piece fits, and work around the events that actually happened within the films. It appears that I won't be able to do that with this piece, in large part because I've already referenced a couple things out of order (due to not yet having seen the second and third _Iron Man_ films: apparently Pepper's seeming death happened after the Malibu mansion was destroyed) and because, while reviewing the film timelines, it appears that some major world-shaking events (like the disruption of SHIELD) happen before I could reasonably figure that Tony was emotionally stable enough to do what he's doing in this fic.
> 
> Hence, this fic takes place in a non-canon-compliant universe, wherein some events may be shifted around or even ignored.
> 
> And yeah, the fact that this fic is getting updated means I'm totally procrastinating on the major projects I ought to be working on. So this is not necessarily a good thing, but there's at least one more chapter of this that ought to post sometime this month, before this fic goes on hiatus.

The kiss is barely over before Loki has pulled himself back into the kneeling position, eyes still downcast, but open, his face no longer quite so drawn in pain.

“Master is clever,” Loki rasps, his voice nothing like the purring menace of just two years ago. “My knowledge is at your disposal.”

Tony gulps, fighting off the urge to vault out of the seat and rush into the safety of his mansion. Not that it’d save him, if Loki were to actually attack, and he curses himself for coming out here to relax without having the suit in easy reach. What good is a suit that’s not near him? And sure, who could’ve predicted Thor dropping in out of the blue—but Tony’s made plenty of enemies, some of which he doesn’t even know and therefore can’t trace, and any one of them could attack him at any time.

Of course, Loki _isn’t_ attacking. Isn’t even moving, other than to kneel here, at his feet, quietly drawing breath. Not to say that Loki’s not (inherently) a threat, or that Tony isn’t fighting off memories of being thrown out a window, but… the guy’s covered in bruises and open wounds, his chest spasming at irregular intervals as he fights off the urge to cough. And Tony can’t make himself believe that it’s all some kind of act.

Tony might resist the label of ‘hero’, but letting a guy suffer like this is kinda the other thing. Which means that he needs to put on his big boy pants (Speedo?) and figure out the collar.

“O-okay,” Tony stammers. “So you can talk. That’s… good. A step in the right direction.” He rubs a hand over his face. Is he breathing faster? “Um… uh, why did that work?”

“It’s humiliating,” Loki replies, calmly.

“…Oh good,” Tony says, feeling a bit dizzy. “I… had been kinda thinking this would go in a different direction, but… humiliation, that’s… that’s not as bad as it could have been.” He pauses, but Loki doesn’t move or speak, doesn’t raise his eyes. “So, um… how long will you be able to talk?”

“About thirty more seconds, unless I abuse the privilege.”

“You… what? Explain.”

Loki takes a deep breath. “The collar incentivizes correct behavior. If I use my freedom to act in a way unbecoming to a slave, I will quickly lose the privilege. If I wish to make use of the full time, I will, mmm, _behave_ myself.” There’s a curl of dark amusement to the way he says it. “Eight seconds left.”

“Kiss my foot again,” Tony blurts. “Three times.”

Leaning forward, Loki plants three quick kisses on Tony’s foot, and returns to kneeling.

“So you’re generally aware of how much time you have left?”

Loki nods.

“How much right now?”

“Eighty-four seconds.”

Tony’s mind whirls—what does he most need to know?

“If I ordered you to stand up now, or look me in the eye, you could?”

Loki nods, and suppresses a cough.

“Could you stand up without being ordered to?”

“I could,” Loki says. “However”—he fights off another cough—“it is more… fitting… for a slave to be on his knees.”

“And to not look his master in the eye,” Tony muses, nodding. “I think I’m getting the hang of this. So if you defy the collar, you run down the time faster.”

“Precisely.”

“So when the clock winds down, you can start it up again just by kissing my foot?”

“With diminishing returns, and not immediately, but yes,” Loki says. “It is best not to let it run out to begin with. I can earn more time by further abasing myself, and by following your orders willingly and without resistance.”

“If I wanted to give you orders in the first place.”

Loki tilts his head. “Don’t you?”

Tony opens his mouth, then shuts it again; he shouldn’t waste time arguing the finer points. “Letting the clock run out, does that hurt you?”

“Not directly. It forces me back into the supplication pose, and will not allow me to move for a few minutes, depending on the reason I lost my privileges. Effectively, I am given time to contemplate my misdeeds.”

“Even if you just sat there and let the time run out?”

Loki’s lips twitch. “In that case, I was not attentive enough to the needs of my Master. A slave should not be idle.”

Tony runs a hand through his hair. “So I can’t just leave you in a room. Even if I had one here that I could trust to contain you.”

“I would prefer to be active and able to speak,” Loki agrees, “rather than silent and confined. Ten seconds,” he adds, and can’t hold back the coughs this time. They sound wet, and Tony suddenly wonders about pneumonia… and how it is that gods could even get sick in the first place.

Biting back another round of nausea, Tony pushes his feelings to the back of his mind; he can deal with them later. “Kiss my foot again, three times.”

Loki fights back the coughs long enough to do so, and Tony tries to ignore the feeling of wetness left behind. “Fifty-one seconds,” Loki manages before he’s coughing again.

“Wait, last time it was—is that what you meant by ‘diminishing returns’?”

It takes Loki a moment to get his coughs back under control, and once he’s talking, he sounds weary. “I cannot earn time effectively just by repeating the same action. I believe the idea is to not allow me to become complacent; it is not meet for a slave to have much control.”

“So I couldn’t just have you kiss my feet a hundred and twenty times an hour. Not that I wanted to do that,” he adds hastily. “My feet do not need that much kissing, and honestly? it’s kinda gross.”

“It would not achieve your objective, no. A variety of tasks would work better.”

“Okay, so… what sort of task would give you an hour?”

Loki considers. “I could attend to your physical needs—dressing, bathing, feeding you.”

“Yeaaahhh, I’m not about to trust you with any of that. What else?”

“For roughly an hour? Various chores. Cleaning and organizing, cooking and serving meals, gardening, sewing, basic crafts, and so forth. Nine seconds.”

“Kiss my foot, three times.”

Loki does. “Thirty-eight seconds.”

“Wow, you weren’t exaggerating.” Tony stops to consider his options. “Well, I can’t trust you with my food… I don’t need a maid or a tailor or a gardener, and I can’t think what sort of crafts would be at all helpful to me. I… suppose I could set up some time-wasters, enough to tide you over until your brother returns?”

Stiffly, Loki takes in a breath, and lets it out again, trembling with the effort of keeping his lungs under control. “If you are not pleased with my efforts, it’s not as effective; the collar is training me to please you.” He chokes back another cough. “And Thor will not be returning, Master. Not for a very long time. Perhaps not at all.”

“What?” Tony blurts, startled. “Why not?”

But Loki just crumples down into the supplication pose.

“Fuck! I thought you had more time. Ah… kiss my feet again, like a dozen times?” Loki doesn’t move. “Loki? C’mon—”

When Loki starts shuddering, Tony remembers:

_It forces me back into the supplication pose, and will not allow me to move. I am given time to contemplate my misdeeds_.

Even if it’s his master’s stupidity that let the clock run out. And Tony’s just given him yet another order that the collar won’t let him obey.

“Stop! Orders rescinded. Just… just rest, okay?”

Loki’s fingers curl into insults again, and his shudders increase for a moment before the tension finally bleeds away.

Maybe the supplication pose won’t let him ‘rest’.

“Orders rescinded. Uh, if you _can_ rest, go ahead and rest. Otherwise, just… stay in that pose until it lets you move, I guess. And let me know when you can move again? Sorry! Fuck.”

Loki chuckles soundlessly, then winces and coughs wetly and goes still again. And Tony stops to contemplate.

_The collar incentivizes correct behavior_.

_If you defy the collar… act in a way unbecoming to a slave… you run down the time faster_.

So if Tony doesn’t want Loki crawling around his house, averting his eyes, and only speaking when spoken to, he’s gotta help Loki build up _more_ than the normal amount of time. Maybe double? He should experiment to figure out how fast it runs out.

Without letting it run out. Because the ‘contemplate your misdeeds’ phase is bullshit.

As to how to fill the clock? Humiliation, apparently, that’s one way. Basic chores that he has no need of, and thus are less effective. Following Tony’s orders, if he can find some balance between orders he’d like to see Loki fulfill, and orders that Loki could follow willingly and without resistance. Needs to be a variety of tasks, and they haven’t yet found even _one_ task that Tony would be glad for Loki to perform.

Not that he wants Loki here to begin with, but it doesn’t look like there are other options right now.

_Thor will not be returning_… He’s gonna need more info on that one, but that’s low-priority; he’d already understood that he was on his own for a while. _I must entrust my brother’s care to you_ for who knows how long. Maybe there’s something bad going down on Asgard. Even if not, there’s no way to contact Asgard directly, and Asgardians live for thousands of years—it’s possible that Thor could show up after a few _decades_ that, for him, felt more like a long weekend. Which means that Tony needs to work out a long-term solution, fast.

At least _two_ long-term solutions, come to think of it. One to allow Loki to live on Earth in some humane fashion, working around the collar’s restrictions. Another to convince SHIELD, who will inevitably clue in to his presence, that he’s not a threat.

_Assuming_ that he’s not a threat, and that Tony can know and prove that he’s not a threat; Tony has no way of knowing how much of this is real. Thor certainly thought that it was real. Tony is _inclined_ to think that it’s real, because Loki seems so hurt, but—

—actually, does the collar keep Loki from lying? Or at least punish him for deceiving… whoever’s in charge of him? Might Loki be lying about how much time he gets? Did he just pretend to be overcome by the supplication pose?

(Because if Tony were stuck behind a magical restriction, he’d probably try to hide the extent of the limitations. Kinda like pretending that your handcuffs are tighter than they actually are.)

The obvious test (which Tony doesn’t need to try right away) is to pile up a lot of if-based commands: _If the collar will let you, stand up. If the collar will let you, touch your toes. If the collar will let you, tell me why you’ve been lying about it_. The collar shouldn’t hurt Loki unless he’s able to obey, and the distinction between Loki being hurt and Loki being okay has been pretty obvious so far. If it’s not obvious, he could throw commands while JARVIS runs some scans.

That’s information he can make use of later, if need be. Looking at Loki now—who, for all his bravado, is still covered in wounds (some of them cracked and bleeding), still emaciated, still coughing at irregular intervals—Tony’s putting together a different priority list.

They’ve got an idea—_some_ idea—of how to charge the meter, which was the first and most important matter to pin down. Next thought is the health and well-being of the… _prisoner_, not slave, Tony doesn’t keep slaves. And Loki’s health is… not so great. Tony didn’t think to ask when was the last time he’d eaten anything, or whether there are other pressing concerns. Does he need to use the bathroom? What about sleep? His eyes were kinda dark and baggy, but then, weren’t they just as bad the first time he’d been to Earth? Is that just normal for the guy?

Well, there’s two things Tony can fix right away, at least in part. He vaults to his feet again and heads into the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warning:** A lot of discussion of the mechanics of a collar that controls Loki through pain, and is trying to basically brainwash him (through reward and punishment) into being an obedient slave.
> 
> Tony has some signs of a panic attack, but doesn't go into a full-blown episode (at least in this chapter).


	5. Supplies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Stay well hydrated, take a steamy shower, drink ginger tea with honey. Chicken soup comes _most_ recommended.”_   
_“What, that’s not just folk wisdom?”_   
_“Not entirely, sir, although a good deal of the effects could be tied down to the placebo effect, comfort food, and the physiological effects of human pack-bonding.”_   
_Tony pauses. “Pack-bonding?”_   
_“Humans respond to interpersonal care on a physiological level. Social grooming prompts the brain to release oxytocin, which reduces stress, increases positive social behaviors, and—”_   
_“So your brain rewards you with the happy hormones. Right.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did what I could with the medical research, but don't take it as an expert opinion. As for Tony's method for overcoming his PTSD: I've heard of similar controlled-exposure techniques for getting over a phobia, but I've no experience with the details. It sounds plausible, it seems like it could be helpful, and it seems unlikely to be very harmful, aside from the fact that Tony's doing it entirely on his own and one might think that some friend or medical professional being in the area would be a useful safety precaution.

Step one: Medical supplies. Tony’s always had a thing for that Boy Scout ideal, mostly because he’s impatient enough that when he wants an ingredient or resource, he wants it _now_, and that means keeping the house stocked with just about anything he could ever find a use for. So it’s easy enough to locate a gel marked for wound treatment. ‘Iodosorb’? Huh. Not a familiar brand name, but then, JARVIS is the guy who buys the stuff, and Tony’s gotta trust his own creation when it comes to picking out the best.

Anything else that’s useful? Bandages, obviously—he grabs an assortment, along with gauze, scissors, and a couple kinds of medical tape—and he might need to wash the wounds first, some of them anyway, so some clean washrags, wound cleanser… what else? Do human painkillers even work on Asgardians? Would they be harmful to Asgardians? Can Asgardians _have_ allergies? He can’t imagine Thor's celestial biology going haywire and attacking Thor from the inside.

He’s got some leftover Vicodin, but he’s not sure whether to risk it. Grabs it anyway, along with some Ibuprofen, stuffs it in the sack.

What about the cough? How do you treat a cough?

“Hey, JARVIS? Anything in here that’ll help with a bad cough?”

“A dry cough or a wet cough, sir?”

“Wet. Definitely.”

“_A wet cough is almost always the sign of a viral or bacterial infection_,” JARVIS informs him, as though reading that tidbit directly off the web. “The issue will resolve over time, so the treatment options simply alleviate the symptoms. Stay well hydrated, take a steamy shower, drink ginger tea with honey. Chicken soup comes _most_ recommended.”

“What, that’s not just folk wisdom?”

“Not entirely, sir, although a good deal of the effects could be tied down to the placebo effect, comfort food, and the physiological effects of human pack-bonding.”

Tony pauses. “Pack-bonding?”

“Humans respond to interpersonal care on a physiological level. Social grooming prompts the brain to release oxytocin, which reduces stress, increases positive social behaviors, and—”

“Yeah yeah yeah,” Tony says, waving a hand. “So Mom takes care of you when you’re sick, brings you chicken soup, and your brain rewards you with the happy hormones. The choice of soup is just tradition, right?”

“Broth-based soups in general would be good, but studies suggest that chicken soup in particular has mild anti-inflammatory effects. It is best to avoid creamy or fatty soups, which may thicken the phlegm.”

“Fine, fine. What about drugs?”

“Guaifenesin makes phlegm thinner and easier to cough up. Conversely, dextromethorphan helps suppress the cough, reducing lung irritation. Unfortunately, sir, I do not believe that either of these has been tested for use in non-human patients. It is likely that Asgardian physiology would not respond to these treatments as human physiology does.”

Right. Basics. Just because Loki _looks_ human doesn’t mean that he _is_ human. Thor’s, like, six hundred pounds, because Asgardian bones and muscles are three times as dense as human ones. Even a skinny twerp like Loki weighs in at close to five hundred.

Which means the doses would be quite different, if the drugs affected them to begin with. And… probably means that they need far more calories than humans do. No wonder Loki’s gone from ‘skinny’ to ‘emaciated’.

Okay, step two: Food.

En route to the kitchen, Tony recalls his first cheeseburger after getting back from Afghanistan. How badly he’d wanted to get back to normalcy. How good that cheeseburger had tasted, not just on a physical level but on a psychological one as well… and just how badly it had disagreed with him after the press conference.

Turns out that three months of torture, stress, heat stroke, and near starvation leaves your digestive tract unable to handle greasy comfort food like cheeseburgers. Tony spent a few days fighting his own body for the right to eat real food again, and he doesn’t care to put Loki through that mess if he can help it. Not least because he might end up having to _clean up_ that mess.

What’s he got stocked up, anyway? Fruit? Pudding? Maybe that’s _too_ sweet. Some crackers, that’ll help. Most of his supplies… well, not the most healthy diet, that’s for sure. He’s just about to tell JARVIS to order a new delivery when he thinks twice about that.

There’s no telling exactly how thoroughly SHIELD is monitoring his activities, but they’ll likely pick up on any deviations from his norm. And before Fury comes knocking on his door, Tony needs time to figure things out and get some contingency plans in place. So… best to make do with whatever he’s got in the house.

In the way of non-alcoholic drinks, he grabs bottled water, and then has to hunt through his selection of mixers. Finds some Sprite and figures that’s good enough to help settle the stomach. Would be nice to know exactly what’s wrong with Loki’s lungs—cold, pneumonia? What else could make you cough like—

Tony has to stop and lean against the bar and take deep breaths for a few minutes, reminding himself that he _can_ take deep breaths, and that he isn’t currently being drowned, or even in threat of being drowned.

Right before Loki showed up, Tony had been sitting by the pool, trying to make a deal with himself about just how far down the steps he was going to get before he chickened out again. The same deal he’s made every day since this vacation started. He hasn’t been swimming since Afghanistan; he’s been underwater, sure, in the safety of his suit and its own personal air supply. But he’s got this giant pool, a pool that he designed with his own hands, and it feels like it’s _mocking_ him. And dang it, it’s not even that he _wants_ to swim again; he could happily go the rest of his life without getting into a tank of water.

It’s that he is sick of being reminded of all that Afghanistan took from him. More times than he can recall, he’s had women in that pool, coaxed them to join him for a night of carnal pleasures that often ended in a moonlight swim. His fear of immersion has been denying him that category of fun. And other people, sensible people with an awareness of their limitations, would just accept the change and find other ways to have fun, but Tony Stark has never been the type to accept limitations.

So ever since coming to grips with just how badly that experience has fucked him over, he has been making it a _point_, whenever he gets a good chunk of time for himself, to dismantle his psyche and build it back up. Like any other malfunctioning machine. Slowly, painfully, _privately_, with frequent missteps and a lot of backsliding, he’s been reclaiming those parts of himself that the Ten Rings thought to destroy. He’s been overcoming _himself_.

Even if that means sitting in the California sun until he blisters, with his feet just barely in the water, as he fights off waves of panic attacks, carefully convincing himself that it’s okay, that he can leave at any time but that he doesn’t have to leave _yet_.

Of course, _today_ is a wash. He’d almost convinced himself to get his calves into the water (not his knees, just his calves, like halfway up) when Thor had shown up and dropped off his new charge. And now Tony doesn’t have the time to cater to his phobias. Because Loki is out there, stuck, and Tony’s the only one who can help him.

Ah well. One step at a time. He’s got the medical supplies, got the food, and… hmm.

How long was it before Loki could move again? He’d said just a couple minutes, right? Should be good by now. And Tony had just told him to rest, as much as he could.

_Let me know when you can move again_.

“JARVIS?” Tony asks, heading for the door before he’s even put it all together. “Has Loki, um”—Loki can’t speak—“made any sound since I left?”

“He has been coughing, sir, but no sound other than that. A few minutes after you left, he had a particularly bad coughing spell, which left him in considerable distress.”

Why wouldn’t he… if he can’t call out, he could at least… bang on the floor or something?

_You can’t raise your hands, can you? It won’t let you_.

_Active and able to speak, rather than silent and confined_.

_(Loki’s fingers curling into a message.)_

_It punishes you if you don’t obey me? Even if it won’t let you_—

_Just… let me know when you can move again? Sorry!_

_Fuck_, Tony thinks, rushing for the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** Panic attack. Tony working through his PTSD/phobia of water, trying to fix his brain on his own and without any medical advice/assistance. Again, I don't have any expertise in this area, but I think the general method of exposure I described (slow, controlled, repeated exposure to trigger, while trying to convince body that it's all right, that you can leave at any time but don't have to leave yet) is potentially one way to overcome triggers (eventually). Take that idea with a grain of salt, and if you do try it for yourself, maybe be a little less of a loner than Tony is here.
> 
> Details of Tony's recovery after Afghanistan, specifically the effect on his ability to eat/digest.
> 
> Discussion of medicine, including prescription meds.
> 
> **JARVIS and Medical Advice**  
Whenever I add medical details to one of my fics, I do a bit of research and try to keep it as accurate as I can manage -- and with JARVIS, I wanted to do this even more carefully. Which isn't to say that my work is accurate, so please don't take my words as Gospel truth without checking into them yourself.
> 
> The link between dairy and cold symptoms was a bit hard to pin down. It's been proven to have no correlation to increased mucus production (that's an old wives' tale), but some correlation to thicker phlegm. The sites said this might be connected to the fat in dairy, which made me wonder if eating other fatty foods would cause a similar problem, and if going for fat-free dairy would avoid the effect. Since I don't have time to be exhaustive with my research, I went with a broader "avoid dairy and fatty stuff" thought.
> 
> As far as the cold-symptom drugs: I was once really bored while sick, and ended up looking up all the stuff I was on at the time. I thoroughly recommend doing this; if you get familiar with the basic traits of over-the-counter meds, you can cut down on extra cost along with reducing potential harm from taking drugs you don't need (e.g. if you're not in pain and don't have a fever, you don't need a cold mix that includes acetaminophen (which can damage your liver)). Plus, you might have a better idea of which symptoms can be easily handled at home, and which should have you seeking the advice of a doctor.


	6. Washrag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration strikes with desperate clarity, and he steps past Loki, swivels, and plops himself into the chair, his bare feet by Loki’s outstretched arms. Then he pulls out a washrag and a bottle of water.
> 
> “Hey, Puppet Boy,” he calls out. “Kneel up for me, huh? Let’s get you back to operational.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have noted that I completely lost track of the gems for a chapter or two there. I debated about going back and weaving in the colors they changed to, but decided that Tony seemed distracted enough that it's not unreasonable for him to have ignored them while focusing on other matters for a while. He's trying to deal with a lot of things all at once, and this situation is triggering some emotional issues, so it's no fault of his that he can't keep track of 100% of the useful detail in this situation.
> 
> _Content Warnings in End Note (as usual)_
> 
> By the by, in case I forgot to mention it: I've added some Recommended Fic links to some of the earlier chapters (2 and 3, I think), so you have a wider variety of Slave AU fics to look through. All Loki, so far, I think, specifically Loki being magically compelled, but this time I'll go a little further afield to point at the first Slave AU fic I can remember encountering:
> 
> **Recommended Fic:** [Prima Nocta](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5333156) (series: _All These Burning Hearts in Hell_ ) by Dira Sudis. Tony uses his resources and social status to disguise how he's actually running an underground railroad to free the slaves, and ends up with both Steve and Bucky at the same time, only without anyone being aware of the connection (or the two slaves being aware of the other's presence). Steve is a resistant slave with a weird past, while Bucky has been thoroughly brainwashed into being a "good" slave, to the point of thinking that every pain is deliberately to train him, and that he needs to help his master be more master-like.
> 
> Tony ends up bonding with "Threetoo" (no one knows Bucky's real name) while trying to slowly help him deprogram, but it takes forever because Threetoo's got some serious mental, physical, and emotional issues to get past. And that's before Steve finds out about Bucky and, classically, misinterprets why Tony is treating him the way he is.
> 
> (Oh, and the worldbuild fascinates me! Maybe this is common to slave fics and I just haven't encountered more of them, but you basically get drafted into slavery once you come of age, unless you can prove that you have X, Y, and Z (money, social status, and you're definitely going to get married? I wasn't entirely sure on the details). So the slavery works a lot like the army, or at least it used to. And they effectively put chastity belts on all the slaves, so as to not cause problems or have them distracted by sexuality or whatever. It gets a bit gruesome at points, regarding that (plus, it kinda ignores the fact that getting a boner is not a conscious, controllable action -- I'm not actually sure that you _could_ train yourself to not get them, when exposed to sexual stimuli). But a lot has changed since Steve went off the grid, and slaves have better human rights than they used to, which gives him some better options once Tony explains the difference.)
> 
> Anyway, if you want a glimpse inside the head of a thoroughly brainwashed slave, that's the fic to go for. I believe the series is aiming for a threesome, but I've no idea when they might get there.

“Orders rescinded!” Tony shouts as soon as he hits the pool deck, as soon as he’s in sight of where Loki lies crumpled at the foot of the chair. “Cancel all orders! Cancel!”

There’s not much change in Loki, who remains in supplication pose, hands stretched out toward the chair, legs tucked in underneath him. Even as Tony approaches, he can see that Loki’s trembling, worse than before. Residual pain? How long was he in the house, anyway? Has Loki been hurting this whole time?

“God, Loki, I’m sorry,” he blurts out. “It’s not still hurting you, is it?”

Loki hesitates, then huffs and wiggles his left thumb before breaking off into another coughing jag.

Tony hopes that’s ‘No, it’s not still hurting me,’ as opposed to ‘Incorrect, it _is_ still hurting me,’ and adds ‘make a better simple binary communications system’ to his mental list of ways to unfuck this situation.

The foot-kissing thing isn’t going to be good for much longer; Tony casts around for a better way to get Loki out of the restricted mode. Not much to go on except ‘chores’ and ‘orders’ and ‘humiliation’, but—

Inspiration strikes with desperate clarity, and he steps past Loki, swivels, and plops himself into the chair, his bare feet by Loki’s outstretched arms. Then he sets the Sprite on the side table, digs through his bag, and pulls out a washrag and a bottle of water.

“Hey, Puppet Boy,” he calls out. “Kneel up for me, huh?”

Loki does so, instantly, his eyes downcast, hands on his thighs. He’s still trembling; the gems on his collar glow a faint sickly green.

Damn, he’s been ignoring the collar, too. Those gems are part of the data set, the key to unraveling this problem, and Tony’s been too busy screwing up and panicking to pay attention. Maybe JARVIS caught some of it, but the cameras out here wouldn’t be good angles; it’s on Tony to keep track until they figure it out, or at least get a better way to monitor it. He’s a multitasker by nature; it shouldn’t be this hard.

“Let’s get you back to operational, okay? Take these, and go ahead and wash my feet for me. Slowly and care—no, actually, let’s say, in whichever way would get you the most time.”

Loki shuffles forward on his knees, chains clinking along the tiles; the green of the gems fade as he does so. His head looks up just slightly, just enough to see what Tony’s holding out; he takes them both and sits back down on his knees. Then he sighs, and places the rag and bottle beside him, and leans forward and

licks

Tony’s foot.

Tony flinches _hard_, nearly kicking Loki in the face, and scrambles back over the chair, knocking it over and falling on the edge of the side table, hitting that same part of his rib cage that he already hurt earlier, before the table collapses and Tony tumbles to the tiles below.

When he looks up, panting, Loki is shuffling closer on his knees—trembling, his eyes still averted, eyebrows drawn together, breaths unsteady, but he’s continuing to advance, relentless.

“Stop!” Tony shouts, and Loki sits back in his kneeling pose.

“I’m sorry, Master,” Loki says. The gems are glowing a reddish purple, and Loki’s shaking—still in pain? His expression indicates that he doesn’t have a clue what he did wrong. And why should he? Tony freaking out at the thought of germs is _Tony’s_ problem, and it’s not exactly public knowledge, nor does he want it to be. Little things, like shaking a few hands, he can handle that (he just doesn’t touch anything else until he’s found a sink). He can eat fast food and not think too hard about unsavory ingredients or issues of hygiene, he can press buttons in an elevator without wanting to scour his hands afterwards, but the very thought of having someone lick his foot—not just kiss but _lick_, like actually use his _tongue_—is giving him the heebie-jeebies worse than when he was trying to stick his feet in the pool.

Before Tony has calmed down enough to contemplate his next move, Loki crumples down into the submission pose again, and Tony feels an instant wave of guilt. _I was not attentive enough to the needs of my Master; a slave should not be idle._ And now Loki’s stuck that way for another three minutes (maybe five? they haven’t yet pinned that down).

Shuddering, Tony runs his hands through his hair a few times, and then he rolls onto hands and knees and gets up, righting the chair. For a long moment, he stands with his hand on the back of the chair, torn between the impulse to flee and the desire to help, the weariness that makes him want to just sit down and the fear that makes him want to be as far away from Loki as he can manage.

Finally, he takes a few deep breaths and sits down, in reach of Loki. Who’s coughing again, quietly.

Ugh. Tony is _not_ the kind of guy who ought to be given responsibility.

But he _has_ been, and he can’t exactly pass the buck, and Loki’s his (for now) and Tony just let him get tortured through his own thoughtlessness and the guy needs food and Tony _specifically_ told him to use _whichever way would get you the most time_. And he can’t exactly ask for a detailed analysis of how much extra time that works out to, licking his feet vs. not licking his feet, but hell, Tony just _tortured_ the guy, and—

—and his discomfort doesn’t measure up against Loki’s _inhuman confinement_, even without the torture.

Okay, so.

The thing that made him panic wasn’t so much the germs as the fact that he wasn’t _expecting_ it. Right? He’s put up with germs before, gone to places where he knew in advance that he’d have to shake a few dozen hands and just deal with the awareness of _having germy hands_ for maybe a couple of hours before he could find a sink somewhere and scour them until they turned red.

And he’s here in his own house, with doors that JARVIS can open _for_ him; soon enough he’ll be able to wash his feet, in hot water, scour them with soap, maybe some rubbing alcohol—he’ll be fine. As long as—as long as he (_breathe, just breathe_) as long as he doesn’t have any broken skin on his feet right now. Which he doesn’t. The underside of his left arm has been scraped to hell, and he’s got bruises that he just made worse all down his rib cage, but his feet are fine and they can put up with a little licking. Right?

God, they’re not even an hour into this thing and already he’s making bargains with himself the way he was trying to psych himself up for dipping his toes in the pool.

“Loki,” he says, and it comes out a bit more croaky than he expected, “whenever you’re able to move again, kneel up for me. If it’ll let you.”

He sits there, with his eyes closed, centering himself for a long minute, maybe two, before he hears Loki move. A few deep breaths, and he opens his eyes. Time to do this. He can take it.

It’s another few moments before he can pull together the courage to _command_ it, but he does, and then he’s taking deep breaths and trying to force himself to relax, to let Loki go on licking, just let it happen. It’s not… unpleasant, as far as the physical sensations go, even though his brain is firing off waves of _gross_ and _contamination_ along with revulsion over Loki humiliating himself this way, and worries over what sort of germs Loki might be pulling into an already compromised system.

_(As Tony recalls from walking in on a conversation between Natasha and Fury, human concepts of purity are strongly related to what is allowed to go in your mouth. (The conversation had turned out to be a discussion of the most efficient ways to break prisoner morale.) Small wonder his brain doesn’t like this.)_

The gems, though, they’re fading, the red-purple slowly dying away. And as he focuses on that detail, he watches them change to a very faint blue.

Huh.

Eventually, and none too soon, Loki draws back and opens the bottle, pours some water on the rag, and begins to quietly wash away the evidence of his… devotion, Tony supposes was the point. It’s better, because it’s getting rid of some amount of germs, but Tony still wishes that he’d thought to grab some actual soap.

A moment later, Loki murmurs, “Master is gracious.”

An awkward grimace crosses Tony’s face. “Gracious? For what? Leaving you to suffer from a command I didn’t think through? Wandering off so I wouldn’t even realize that you were hurting? Panicking so bad I put you right back into ‘contemplate your misdeeds’ mode?”

“For allowing me to earn back my freedom, such as it is,” Loki answers. “The privilege to serve you.”

“Why the hell are you so calm about this?” Tony blurts. He almost adds more (_have you gotten used to being tortured? have they broken you already?_ ), but then it strikes him that that might very well be the case. He’s been trying not to think about it—not just how badly Loki is wounded, but exactly what was done to make the wounds in the first place. What all Loki must have gone through since they sent him back up to the tender mercies of Asgard.

Loki simply smiles. “A slave should remain calm and pleasing to his master,” he murmurs, the strokes of his washrag slow and careful and soothing. “It is not my place to get upset, and certainly not my place to let such unpleasing emotions disturb the quiet of my master.”

Tony stops to consider that. “In other words, you’d run your time out too quickly if you dared to get angry. Even if it’s justified.”

“Master is”—he suppresses another cough—“astute,” Loki says, and Tony recalls Loki flipping him off earlier, _twice_. The guy’s not broken, or not _completely_ broken; he’s just good at working within limitations. And good at playing a role—Tony’s familiar enough with _that_ song and dance, and he has, come to think of it, played the role of ‘cowed and obedient prisoner’ before.

“And complimenting me is a way of demonstrating the right attitude toward your ‘master’,” Tony guesses. “Which it rewards you for, yeah?”

“It is an effective way to train the mind,” Loki agrees, continuing to rub gently at Tony’s ankle.

“Yeah, well, you know this whole collar thing is bullshit, right? Brainwashing people is wrong, brainwashing them with pain is worse, and I really don’t want to see you hurt at all, that… that’s not the kind of thing I’m okay with. As long as you’re not trying to hurt other people… you shouldn’t be in pain.”

“Master is merciful,” Loki says, “but I would not presume upon your good graces.”

The phrasing reminds Tony that however far Loki has fallen, he was raised as a prince, trained in diplomacy—and how did Thor, crown prince of the Golden Realm, miss that class?

The washrag pulls away from his foot, and Loki hesitates. “Master? Shall I wash your right foot in the same manner as the left?”

More licking. Tony takes a few deep breaths. “Do it.”

Loki bends to lick at Tony’s foot, giving it just as thorough a treatment as the first one, while Tony tries not to squirm.

“I’m not,” Tony says, “the most merciful guy, y’know?” Is he breathing faster _again?_ “It’s just… you’re under my care now, and I… I keep making mistakes that result in pain. I didn’t sign up for that. There’s gotta be some way to… to make sure that it can’t…”

Pausing, he mulls over the idea forming in his mind. There’s probably some angle that he’s not seeing, some way it’ll still screw up, but it’s worth a shot, for now. “Okay, let’s try this: If I order you to do something, but the collar won’t let you do it, my order—that _specific_ order—is rescinded, and the next time you are able to talk to me, you need to explain the collar’s countermand. We need to get a handle on this, and I can’t get anywhere without accurate data.”

Briefly, Loki pauses, then he finishes up with a few more licks and sits up to pour water on the washrag. His gems are glowing blue, though still not a very strong glow.

“Is that…” Tony frowns. “Do you see any problems with that order?”

Loki begins rubbing the rag over Tony’s foot. “It would be unseemly for a slave to find fault with his master’s orders.”

Groaning, Tony rubs his hand over his face. “Okay, just talking about the logic I used, do you see any area in which my wording and my intentions fail to overlap?”

“That would presume that I understood my master’s intentions.”

“Just the intentions as I’ve stated them. I don’t—I don’t want you to be hurt by the collar countermanding my orders. Does my new order seem likely to solve that problem?”

For a long moment, Loki simply continues to wash Tony’s foot; from what Tony can see of his face, he seems thoughtful. Finally, he takes a deep breath. “I am not sure if the collar will take your wording quite the way I take it, or allow such broad orders in advance, but it seems to be a reasonable attempt. The part about the explanation is not worded as a command, though, so I believe the collar would give me discretion. Which might be a good thing, depending on what other information I might need to convey at the time.”

“Wording is a big deal, huh?”

“The collar is very precise in responding to the Master’s commands. It does not allow for leeway or confusion, and its grasp of idioms is minimal at best. For example, you have repeatedly given me the order to ‘go ahead’, and even though I understand it as part of the phrasing of the next order, the collar forces me to physically move forward.”

Tony’s mouth hangs open for a second, and then he snaps it shut. “Well, great. Another detail I need to watch out for.” He groans again, listening to Loki fight off another round of coughs—and then he recalls the bag he’d brought out. “Hey, how much time have you built up so far?”

“Seven minutes and thirty-three seconds.”

Tony takes note of the gems: blue, a stronger glow than earlier but he’d still guess it’s not even at half strength. “Great. Um… would you be earning time faster if you weren’t talking to me at the same time?”

Loki shrugs, and winces. “Answering your questions swiftly and accurately is good slave behavior. Adding in my own opinion, attitude, or preferences is not. If I can answer a question usefully without speaking, the collar prefers that I do so.”

“Hmm. I’d been wondering why you were nodding even after you could talk. So… talking itself isn’t a bad thing, but it’s up to you whether it improves your situation or makes it worse.”

“More or less.”

“Well, go ahead and—I-I mean, stop what you’re doing, and…” He reaches for the bag, but his hand finds empty air. When he turns, he realizes that the table is still where he knocked it over, the contents of the bag scattered across the tiles. The bottle of Sprite is floating in the pool.

He almost wants to laugh. Instead, he gets up and retrieves the second bottle of water, and holds it out to Loki. “Here.”

After taking it, Loki simply holds it in front of him, with both hands, almost reverently. The glow gets noticeably stronger.

Tony frowns. “You can drink it. It’s yours.”

“Master is generous,” Loki says, with a little bow. He briefly examines the bottle, and then unscrews the cap and takes a sip, holding it in his mouth for a long moment before swishing it around and swallowing. Then he takes two more good sips, closes the bottle, and sets it on the tiles by his side.

Tony blinks at him. “The whole thing is yours; you can drink as much as you want.”

“I understand, Master. It is a most considerate gift.” But the water stays where it is.

“The collar’s not keeping you from drinking more, is it?”

Loki hesitates. “Not… precisely. It would allow me, but it is best to attend to my needs privately. While I am in the Master’s presence, my purpose is to serve the Master’s needs, not my own.”

Huh. “Do you… _want_ to drink more? I mean, you shouldn’t drink it too fast, but… would you prefer to drink more now, or to stop drinking?”

“I would prefer not to lose time by answering questions about my preferences.” The gems dim a little. “Five minutes and eighteen seconds left.”

“Ah. Right. Um… okay, not preferences, then. Are you still thirsty?”

Loki gives a quick nod.

“So if you were free to drink more, would you drink more?”

Another nod.

“But that’s best done when I’m not in the room?”

_Yes_.

“Well, I did forget to grab a spoon for the pudding, so…” Tony says, turning toward the house. Then he thinks twice, and picks up the bag, roots through it for the saltines. “Here,” he says, handing them to Loki. “Eat a few of these, and drink water if you want to. And then, um… set that table up, next to the chair, and pick up all the stuff I knocked over. Lay it out on the table. Except for the bottle that’s floating in the pool—I’ll get that later. Got it? I’ll be right back.”

More than four minutes remaining, by Tony’s count, but then he’s never been great at keeping track of time. And Loki’s going to earn a bit more by picking things up after Tony’s panic. Still, he hurries to find a spoon and (while he’s at it) a small glass, and get back before too long.

Loki’s still kneeling in place, in front of the chair, but he must have moved because the table has been set up and everything that had spilled out of the bag has been neatly sorted on the table. The saltines are there too, but open, and a glance says that three or four are missing—great. The water bottle sits on the floor beside Loki, about three quarters empty; Tony sighs with relief as he sits down.

“How’s your stomach?” he asks, mindful again of how difficult it can be to get back to normal eating habits after being starved.

“Well enough,” Loki replies.

“How much time do you have left?”

“Three minutes and forty-nine seconds.”

“Think you could try a little pudding?”

The corners of Loki’s mouth turn down, just slightly. “Whatever Master sees fit to provide.”

“Yeah, well,” Tony says, picking up a pudding cup, “I don’t want you eating so much that you get sick. So if you feel like you want to stop eating, then stop eating, okay? But if you feel like having a little more in your stomach, go ahead and—I mean, you can eat some of this.” He opens the pudding cup and hands it over, with a spoon.

Hesitantly, Loki dips the spoon in and brings out just a little bit to try. His face wrinkles at the taste, but he swallows and takes a larger spoonful.

“You don’t like it?”

After swallowing, Loki bites his lip. “It is… unfamiliar. And very sweet.”

Tony gets the impression that there’s more being left unsaid, and he almost asks for it.

_Adding in my own opinion, attitude, or preferences is not good slave behavior_.

Which means he shouldn’t be trying to figure out the distinction between American sweets and Asgardian ones, not yet. And Loki seriously needs the calories. So… “If you don’t like a type of food, but I tell you to eat it anyway, would that count against your time?”

Loki shakes his head. “If I do what Master tells me to do, I gain time, and I do gain more when it’s something I don’t want to do. However, because it’s sustenance, the amount is slight, unless it is particularly revolting.”

“Would the pudding do you any harm? or make you throw up?”

Again, Loki shakes his head.

“Then eat about half of it. And if your stomach can handle a bit more, then eat the rest.”

“Yes, Master,” Loki murmurs, and eats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** Panic attacks. Germaphobes might be exceedingly uncomfortable for part of this chapter.
> 
> Humiliation (pretty mild, and, due to the scenario, not gratuitous).
> 
> Behavioral modification, though, at this point, it's questionable how much is the collar forcing Loki to do things, how much is Loki brainwashed by his 'training', and how much is Loki specifically choosing behavior that benefits him over behavior that would let him be himself but at cost (losing time on the collar).
> 
> * * *
> 
> Two updates in one day! Well, technically, I was sitting on the fifth chapter until I was sure it wasn't going to seriously contradict this chapter, because I've ended up with a couple bits this past month where I've had to go back and fix up some previous chapters to better mesh with where I was heading (expect at least one such update to the "Loki wins" fic -- an update to chapter three to make chapter five flow better).
> 
> And yeah, still haven't been able to seriously focus on _Unseen Things_. But I blame that mostly on being sick. At least with this one I can write a character I deeply sympathize with at the moment ^_^
> 
> I've basically decided on which fics will get updated alongside _Unseen Things_ in celebration of Creepyfest (my term for October-specific content). If all goes well, there should be two, possibly three POI fics, and one, possibly two Loki fics… though this refers to, specifically: finishing up UT, starting a fic, updating a fic, starting a fic, and posting a one-shot. The fics listed as "starting" will not be finished during October, not by a long shot, but it feels like a good time to get them going.


	7. The Purpose of Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He'd already suspected that the Golden Realm was merely _gilded_: beautiful to look at, but much less shiny underneath.
> 
> He didn’t need this kind of confirmation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, some of the cats are out of the bag, at least. Tony doesn't handle it well.
> 
> (Sensitive readers, remember to check my End Note for chapter-specific content warnings.)

“Okay,” Tony says, relaxing into the chair. “Food, water, we got that handled—for now. Medical care soon enough, and basic hygiene… hey, do you need to use the bathroom?”

Loki shakes his head and continues eating.

Did Asgardians even _use_ the bathroom? They called themselves ‘gods’ and had access to magic; maybe their metabolisms weren’t as wasteful as the ones humans were stuck with. But then, he’s just seen Loki’s ass, and it doesn’t look like a Ken doll down there. And Loki didn’t seem mystified by the concept, so—

Wait. ‘Bathroom’ was one of those weird Americanisms, right? One of those terms that confused tourists.

“Um, when I say ‘bathroom’, do you understand what I’m asking you about?”

Loki swallows, and dips his spoon back in the pudding. “A place where I can relieve my bodily functions; would you like me to be more specific?” He takes another spoonful.

“No, that’s—that’s fine. I wasn’t sure if you understood the term, that’s all. I guess you learned it while you were, um, during the invasion?”

“We of Asgard converse in the Allspeak,” Loki says. “If the concept is known across the Nine Realms, then there is no confusion, even if only a few cultures have a specific term for the idea.”

“…Huh. Is that why I could read Thor’s note? Because that was definitely not a language I’m familiar with, but I understood it perfectly.”

“A similar concept, yes.”

“Oh, good.” Thor can talk to anyone, and everyone can understand him, and Tony hasn’t yet stopped to consider exactly how that works. Magic that affects the mind, apparently. It gives him the willies, and yet he’s undeniably drawn to the thought of sitting Loki down in front of some recording equipment and having JARVIS analyze the sound waves. See if the sound he hears differs from what’s actually being produced. See if people with different native languages can still understand the recording, and, if so, how many layers of manipulation it takes to destroy that effect.

For now, though, he’s got more important matters to focus on.

“Okay, what’s next?” When Loki looks up from his pudding cup—not all the way, but noticeably at attention—Tony waves a hand. “Don’t stop eating, I’m just gonna talk to myself for a bit.”

As Loki gets back to his pudding, Tony starts to wonder about the state of the guy’s knees.

“Wait, actually—”

Loki quickly swallows his mouthful. “‘Wait’ and ‘don’t stop’ are incompatible commands, Master. It’s going to punish me for not being able to fulfill both, but it won’t trigger your countermand because it’s not actually preventing me from doing either one.”

“Oh, shit. Uh. Cancel the order to keep eating. I didn’t mean that anyway, I just—I meant that you shouldn’t stop eating just because I’d asked questions, because the questions wouldn’t be aimed at you, just my way of working out a problem.” He groans. “But I suppose the collar wouldn’t pick up on that nuance.”

Raising his eyebrows with a half-mocking frown, Loki shakes his head.

“Well. Uh. Your knees. You’ve been kneeling or crawling since you got here, and that can’t be comfortable, right? Not on hard surfaces like this. And I still haven’t gotten a good look at them to tell if they’re injured like the rest of you. _Are_ they injured? And should I get something soft for you to kneel on?”

Again, Loki briefly hesitates. “My knees are somewhat bruised, Master, but as far as I know”—he coughs again—“there are no open wounds. It is, of course, at the master’s pleasure whether a slave should be accorded some form of comfort while performing his duties.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Tony says. “Finish the command that I gave you about the pudding cup, and I’ll be right back. Again.”

With a couple of thick towels under Loki’s knees, Tony feels some relief, though the sooner they can get Loki past this kneeling stage, the better Tony’s going to feel.

“How much time you got left, now?”

“Four minutes and fifteen seconds.”

“That thing doesn’t give you much leeway, does it?” Not waiting for Loki’s headshake, Tony runs his hands over his face. “So pain is just part of a slave’s day-to-day, huh?” he asks, as casually as he can manage in the hopes that it won’t trigger bile again.

Between bites, Loki pauses long enough to get out short phrases. “Some is unavoidable. Some, deliberate. Most of it happens because”—_take a bite, swallow, clear mouth_—“it’s more convenient for the master.”

“So the slave’s level of pain doesn’t matter, except as the master wants to punish—or reward.”

“Of course not.” Loki finishes the last bite, and sets the empty cup and spoon down next to his water bottle. “And bearing up under deliberate pain is one of the behaviors that the collar seeks to reward.”

Yeah, okay, the bile’s back, a nasty sour taste in his mouth. It takes Tony a few good breaths to fight back his instinctive revulsion (and images of his own time in captivity, where pain and panic were used as tools to try to control him). “So,” he croaks out, “so, one of the ways we could charge the collar is through _pain?_ ”

There’s nothing particularly stressed on Loki’s face as he gives a firm nod.

“Is that thing _meant_ to be a torture collar?” Tony blurts out.

“It is meant to force compliance. The sooner the slave learns to play his role, the less discomfort he must endure.”

“And, what, pain and humiliation are just the most efficient means of creating that compliance?”

Loki shrugs. “Training an unwilling slave to fulfill his duties is not a pleasant endeavor. No warrior would _willingly_ accustom himself to the role of a bed slave.”

Vaulting out of his chair again, Tony is already inside the house and to the bar before he’s aware of how fast his heart is beating, how fast his breaths. He leans over the sink, balanced on both arms, glad that breakfast was hours ago and there’s not much in his stomach to come up, even if he can’t fight down the urge.

‘Bed slave’. That thing was a _sex slave collar_. He’d guessed at that, early on—maybe all slaves on Asgard were naked, but that seemed unlikely, for many reasons—but he’d hoped—

Hell, Asgard is far more fucked up than he’d ever suspected. And he’d _already_ suspected, back when he’d first learned about Thor, that the Golden Realm was only _gilded_: beautiful to look at, but much less shiny underneath. He didn’t need this kind of confirmation.

How is he supposed to deal with this?

_Without sex_, that’s obvious enough, but… if the collar’s meant to incentivize ‘correct behavior’, there’s no telling what sort of… what is it going to make Loki _do_? It’s already been countermanding the master’s orders, as if the collar knows better than the master what the slave ought to be doing. What happens when it forces Loki to offer his body for sex, and punishes him when Tony refuses to take him up on it?

He can’t do this. He can’t—he needs Thor to come back, needs to—but Thor might not be coming back soon, or maybe not at all. And he can’t call in help, or SHIELD is going to start sniffing around, and with Loki this helpless…

Breathing harshly through his nose, he pours himself some water, and swishes it around in his mouth. Doesn’t do much against the taste of the bile. He needs some mouthwash—but then, most mouthwash is just flavored and denatured alcohol, right? He’s got the real thing.

One gin gargle and three more shots later (because he’s not going to form an association with the kind of alcohol he _likes_), he realizes that he’s lost track of time again. Which probably means that Loki is back in supplication pose.

At this rate, he’s _never_ going to get the poor guy into the house.

And when did he start thinking of Loki as ‘the poor guy’, anyway? That ‘poor guy’ tried to conquer New York, and threw Tony out a plate-glass window. Sixty-eight stories up. That ‘poor guy’ terrorized civilians in Stuttgart, and caused eighty-eight billion dollars in property damage. He brainwashed Barton, forcing him to attack his own teammates and to nearly bring down a helicarrier full of hundreds of (relatively) innocent people. The invasion killed, what, seventy-four people in New York alone, and Loki probably killed a few while he was in hiding, and—Coulson wasn’t the only SHIELD agent who died during the attack on the helicarrier, but Tony can’t recall if he was ever given an actual number.

The totals don’t matter. Loki came to earth on a campaign of death and destruction, and he accomplished more than enough of both. He needed to be stopped, and they stopped him. If it looks like he’s going to try more of the same, then he needs to be neutralized—but it looks like that’s been accomplished, at least in the short term. That much, he deserves.

He doesn’t deserve to be tortured. That’s why Tony can’t just wash his hands of the affair by handing him over to SHIELD; SHIELD doesn’t care about the humane treatment of their prisoners. Hand them a godlike being like Loki, they’re going to go to extremes trying to keep him under wraps. They’ll want ways to block his magic, maybe destroy it permanently. They’ll want ways to stop _him_ if he ever escapes again, and their experiments—Tony doesn’t want to think about the kind of experiments they might try. Testing weapons on Loki until they find the things that harm him, and then trying to figure out which type of harm is the most efficient way to bring him down.

With the collar making him compliant, holding him still, like when he got those artistic cuts all up and down his body. Yeah, they’d like _that_, all right.

But Loki doesn’t deserve to be tortured. Because torture is never acceptable—not _ever_.

And he doesn’t deserve to be raped.

Does that even need to be said?

_Urgh_.

Are his hands shaking?

Sighing, he washes his hands, and rinses them, and runs them, still damp, through his hair.

Loki is his responsibility. And Tony might not be the best choice when it comes to responsibility, but he’s also not the type of person to walk away when the alternatives are torture or… or worse. Would he rather hand this off to someone else? Absolutely. Is he having trouble dealing with the issues? Obviously. Is he repeatedly screwing up in ways that get Loki hurt? Undeniably.

Are the next few days going to be some kind of fresh hell? Almost certainly.

But none of that matters. And all he can do is try.

“JARVIS,” he says, “remind me to send Pepper a care basket to thank her for putting up with me even when she’d rather be doing anything else.”

“Certainly, sir.”

And with that, Tony steels himself and walks back out to the pool deck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** Panic attack.
> 
> Discussion of sexual slavery. Discussion of torture and some related concepts.
> 
> Emetophobes: Tony again feels like throwing up, pretty strongly through a good section of the chapter, but he does not actually throw up.
> 
> * * *
> 
> So I _think_ this is the last update on this one until the new year? But then, I've been wrong before, and there's plenty of time for procrastination to creep in and redirect my attention away from the pieces that I ought to be working on.
> 
> It's also possible that I'll end up cranking out chapter eight and squeaking it in _right_ before the end of the month here. Who knows.
> 
> Anyway, I would like to reiterate that I am fully in favor of anyone building off my work in any way they feel like building, so if something strikes your fancy or you'd like to write a follow-up, or a "how Loki got into this mess," or Loki's POV during his time on Tony's pool deck, or your own version of how Tony might've handled it, or what the hell Thor is up to, or anything at all, feel very free to do so! I'm never stingy with my ideas. (I also have no problem with you mutating my work out of recognition, including putting a sexual spin (of any flavor) on whatever I came up with.)
> 
> With all that said, keep an eye out for **Creepyfest**, starting Tuesday, the first of October! All bets are off as I segue into the season of the spooky!


	8. Collating the Data

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony deals with Loki's wounds while trying to work out what all he knows about the collar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** Wound care (not that detailed), and a lengthy discussion about the mechanics of the collar, including the fact that it uses pain to control Loki (gasp! how shocking! ikr?).
> 
> This chapter is mostly a sort of summary of what we know so far, or about half of what we know -- what Tony has been able to surmise, with some clarification from Loki. I don't see it as _exactly_ the same as a clip show, but it bears similarities. Mostly just a long conversation. Tony does confirm some things that you might've been wondering about. Feel free to ask for more clarification in the comments! I'll be glad to discuss any details that I think readers should already know, and point out when certain details haven't yet shown up in the text.

“When the collar will let you, kneel up for me,” Tony says as soon as he’s in earshot, and then he has to push back a wave of guilt for letting Loki get trapped by the collar _yet again_. Guilt isn’t going to help him. And Tony’s got basically three choices: have another breakdown, sit around waiting for the collar to release the guy, or… do something constructive with the time.

And ‘constructive’ comes down to either talking (it feels like he’s been talking for weeks) or… well, Loki’s back is covered in wounds, and Tony picked out medical supplies for a reason, so… that much is obvious.

“I’m, ah, I’m going to see what I can do about the wounds on your back,” he informs Loki. “It might hurt a bit; sorry in advance.”

Loki’s ribs shake. _Probably_ a laugh, and it’s not hard to imagine that, after everything Loki has been through lately, a little extra pain is nothing to be afraid of.

Which does make Tony feel a bit better, although he’s going to try his best not to make it hurt more than it has to.

Once he’s gathered the supplies into some semblance of useful order, and pulled the chair and the little table around to just beside Loki, he heads back into the house to get his hands nice and clean. Given that he’s just run them through his hair and all. While he’s at it, he grabs a box of disposable gloves and a little trash bag.

Finally, though, he’s ready to—

hmm

“Your hair is… kind of a mess,” he muses aloud, tugging _very_ gently at part of it, trying to get a feel for how bad it is. “It’s all matted, and parts of it are stuck in your wounds. I’m probably going to have to cut it a bit just to, um, to fix you up, but… it’ll be easier if I just cut a good chunk of it off, get it out of the way.”

Loki’s back is tense and trembling. How badly does he want his hair to stay intact?

Sighing, Tony walks around to the front again, where he can see both of Loki’s thumbs. “Okay. I take it you’d prefer me not to cut your hair, yeah?”

There’s a disgruntled _obviously_ in the way Loki’s right thumb circles around.

“Right. But it’ll be a lot easier to tend to your wounds if I can cut a _little_ bit. A few inches. Are you okay with that much?”

A very long hesitation, and then both thumbs jerking back and forth. _I guess_.

“Wouldn’t it be best, though, if I cut a bit off anyway? I mean, it’ll grow back, right? But if you don’t want me to do it, and I do it anyway, that charges up the collar.”

A quick, emphatic _NO_.

Tony blinks.

“It… wait, I asked three questions there, not sure which one you’re responding to. Um, it will grow back, eventually, yes?”

_Yes_.

“And doing something that you don’t like is one way to charge the collar.”

Both thumbs, in opposition: _Not exactly_.

“Wait, I thought…” Tony rubs between his eyebrows. “If you have to do something you don’t want to do, that helps charge the collar.”

Mostly _yes_, a little _no_.

Huh?

“All right, I’m stumped!” he says, throwing his hands in the air. “I thought I was starting to understand this stuff. Um… how long before you’re free to start earning points again, anyww_wait_.” He resists the urge to chuckle, mostly at himself, because it’s not funny, but it’s so _obvious_. “You can’t earn points like this. Because you’re not free to do anything but lie there; you can’t obey because you can’t _resist_. Which means that if I cut your hair right now, I’d be wasting any potential good it might do for you.”

_YES_, Loki’s thumb confirms, almost savagely.

“Okay. So, I won’t cut it until you’re able to kneel up again. But… when it could do you some good, um, when you’re able to actually charge the collar by accepting something you don’t like, would you be, well, _okay_ with me cutting your hair? Not all of it, just enough that it’s not falling into your wounds again.”

More hesitation, then: _Fine_. In the most sullen manner that a thumb has ever wiggled.

“So how long before you’re out of supplication mode? More than five minutes?”

_No_.

“More than two minutes?”

_No_.

“Less than thirty seconds? I’ve gotta get the right range eventually.”

Both thumbs, which probably means he’s right at the edge of thirty seconds. Not bad.

It’s fascinating that Loki is quick enough to have worked out various nuances of communication from what by all rights should be a basic binary system. And Tony’s really gotta find some way to improve upon it—though, of course, the preferable option would be getting Loki’s collar stoked up so they don’t have to keep resorting to makeshift Morse Code.

…actually, Morse Code might not be a bad idea. He’d wager—a sizable amount, at that—that Loki would be able to soak up the Morse Code chart in five minutes or less, and then he could use those thumbs for a more efficient system than just _Twenty Questions_ and Tony’s best guesses at what’s really going on. Get JARVIS in on the deal, and they could get Loki talking almost as fast as actual speech.

Thoughts for later.

“Well, ideally, I’d start from the top and work down,” he muses, “because that way I can clean up the drips as I go, instead of screwing up parts I’ve already worked on. So I guess it’s best if I wait for—”

Loki pushes himself up into a kneeling position once again, and Tony does allow himself a chuckle, this time.

“All right, then. So, I’m going to cut your hair, just enough to get it out of the way, okay? It’s not gonna look nice, but we can fix it up later; this is purely a matter of being practical.” Also the reason he’s putting on gloves: Tony’s well aware of the risk of blood-borne contaminants, and anything that jumps the species barrier from Asgardian to human is apt to make Ebola hemorrhagic fever look like a case of the sniffles. “If it’s a good time to do this, go a—um, give me a thumb’s up.”

With a soundless sigh, Loki does.

“Okay,” Tony says, and begins to cut, just above shoulder-length. Luckily, the wounds don’t seem to go any higher. “So, while I’m trying to clean you up, here, you just focus on staying still, so I don’t hurt you more than—more than what’s unavoidable. But if it hurts too much… um, if you want me to stop, or to change how I’m doing it, because it hurts more than it needs to hurt, I want you to tell me. Understood?”

“Understood,” Loki echoes in confirmation, without any hint as to his feelings on the matter. More than likely he’ll be stoic about the pain, but Tony doesn’t want him to feel like he _has_ to be. Then again, Loki’s got no reason to trust Tony’s assertions just yet; that’ll only come with time.

One last snip, and the hair falls free; Tony gathers anything not attached to Loki’s healing skin, and sticks it in the trash bag. Then, with a strip of gauze, he ties Loki’s hair in a quick ponytail, brushes away as much of the hair clippings as he can, and stops to discard the first pair of gloves and put on a second.

“I’m gonna try to figure some things out,” he says, as he’s using the wound cleanser to carefully flush out the open, oozing wound on Loki’s shoulder blade, “so just let me muse a bit, unless I’m getting too far off base. If you can help nudge me toward the right ideas, I’d appreciate that, but let’s try to bank up some time before you go wasting it all trying to talk. Unless I specifically ask you a question that you can’t easily answer without talking. Okay?”

Loki nods.

“So, what I’ve got so far. Trying to stick to facts more than hypotheses, though I imagine I’ll hit some of those as well.” He carefully applies the Iodosorb gel, and then covers the wound with gauze and tapes it in place. At least there’s intact skin all around it; that’s not the case with some of the other groups of wounds.

“That collar has at least three modes: Supplication, Restriction, and… Normal, I guess. When you’ve run out your time, it puts you into Supplication Mode, where you can’t do anything for a while, even to follow my orders. After that, you’re in Restricted Mode, where you _can_ follow my orders, or at least some of them. Right so far?”

Loki nods.

“And getting you out of Restricted Mode and back into Normal Mode requires you to follow a direct order from me, but not just any order. Because I had you kneel, crawl, wiggle your thumbs at me, and none of that counted until I got you to kiss my feet. Which worked because it was humiliating. Yeah?”

Again, Loki nods.

“And that kind of… _unlocks_ you, so at that point you can charge the collar by following normal orders. Normal Mode. And it’s best not to let your time run out.” He pauses. “Hey, what exactly unlocked you this time?”

“I accepted you cutting my hair.”

“Which is… humiliating?”

“It’s an intimate act that I had no control over,” Loki explains. “And short hair is one way of shaming a slave.”

“You guys love your locks, huh? Guess that should’ve been obvious. Well, at least it did unlock you… and that wasn’t meant to be a pun, sorry. You’re earning time now, right? Just putting up with this?”

Loki nods, then jerks when Tony tugs a bit hard on some of the stuck hair and it pulls open a scab. “Sorry!” Tony blurts, with a sympathetic wince. “I, um… I guess I’ll have JARVIS look up how best to remove hair from a wound. But it’ll wait.” He moves on to the next lower wound, on the upper side of the rib cage. “Okay, let’s see here. The types of orders that can get you out of Restricted Mode are… are they _all_ humiliating, or is that simply one category of orders that’ll unlock you?”

“‘Humiliating’ contains multiple meanings,” Loki replies. “The orders that, hmm, _unlock_ me are meant to keep me in mind of my station; in that sense, they are all humiliating, or humbling. But specific, deliberate humiliation is only one category of possible commands that will free me from the more restricted mode.”

“Ah. Good.” Not that he minds seeing Loki a bit humbled, but there’s little point in rubbing it in when he’s already a slave. “And the other categories would include, what, bearing up under deliberate pain, and, um… I’m just going to assume that one of the categories is ‘sex’,” he adds in a rush. Better to just get it out there. “Am I correct about that, and are there other categories we could use?”

“Pain and sexual contact are both categories that can unlock me, yes. I can also be made to hold a stress position, or to undergo a situation that causes stress or fear.” Again, nothing in his tone provides any clue about his feelings.

When a moment has passed in silence, Tony summarizes, “Sex, pain, fear, stress, humiliation, or… planking? Physical movements or positions that take effort to maintain? So that’s… basically we have to work with?”

“There may be other categories that I have not yet encountered. And perhaps I’m overlooking some. But those categories should suffice.”

“Well, at least there’s a little room for variety. I’ll consider the options later. Now, given your reactions, I’ve been assuming that the collar controls you by using physical pain until you give in and obey whatever it’s telling you to do.”

Loki shrugs.

Tony hesitates. “It’s… _not_ causing you pain? Or controls you with things that aren’t pain?”

“The pain isn’t quite physical. It is, after all, a magical device.”

“Eh, details. It’s still doing essentially the same thing that physical pain would do, right? Putting you in a state that you’d do anything to get out of?”

“Essentially.”

“But you’re capable of resisting, at least for short periods?”

“It gets exponentially worse the longer you put off obeying.”

“And… that’s what makes you take the supplication pose?”

“It’s more insistent about that pose than it is about other things.”

“So you’ll know for sure that you’ve screwed up. Makes sense. Okay, so… the collar generally wants you to kneel and crawl rather than stand and walk, and to avoid looking your master in the eye, and to avoid speaking if there’s a way to convey the information effectively without words. In Normal Mode, flouting those principles just runs your time out faster; you can still do all of them. But in Restricted Mode, it actually _forces_ all of those behaviors: It won’t _let_ you stand or walk, or talk, or look me in the eye. Even if I command it.”

Loki nods.

“In Restricted Mode, you can kneel and crawl, clean my feet and kiss my feet. Probably a lot of other things. Only… wait. You… you couldn’t raise your thumbs for me. You could kneel up, and clean my feet, but you couldn’t raise your thumbs?”

“I couldn’t do so without your direct order. You never gave it.”

“Ah. So, without my orders, you had to maintain the supplication position. Which is also why you went back to supplication any time I canceled all orders.”

Loki nods.

“And Restricted Mode does let you communicate; it just keeps you from talking, using your voice.”

“It keeps me from making sound of any kind.”

Tony considers that. “It _prevents_ you, or it _punishes_ you?”

“I am physically incapable of forcing my body to break the major restrictions, which includes deliberately making sounds. However, for involuntary breaches, it does punish me.”

“Involuntary…?”

When Loki coughs, Tony suddenly imagines a whole range of sounds that the human body can make without meaning to. Things you can’t control, things you can’t help.

“Wait, it was actually causing you pain because you had to cough? Even though you couldn’t help it?”

When Loki nods, Tony has to fight down his nausea again. “Have I mentioned yet that the guy who designed this collar was a sadist?”

Loki shrugs.

“So, it hurts you for breaking protocol, even if it’s not your fault. Even if you’re in a no-win situation. Like when the collar won’t let you follow my command, or when I give you contradictory orders. Or if my wording doesn’t adequately convey my intentions. But when I cancel the commands, that stops the pain, right?”

Holding the gauze in place, Tony looks up long enough to catch Loki’s nod before he gets back to taping.

“Okay, so, the gems: I’ve seen them change colors. Blue, and a sort of reddish purple, and a truly disgusting olive green sort of thing. And it seems to glow at different strengths. Just from observation, I’m assuming that blue is good, and green is bad. Does blue indicate Normal Mode?”

“I haven’t seen the colors myself, Master.”

“What? Oh. Right, they’re… not exactly in the most visible location, are they? Guess I’m on my own for that one. We’ll figure it out. So… the collar interprets my wording pretty literally, we know that much. And you have a clear idea of what the collar expects you to do, even if it’s misinterpreting my commands?”

“Most of its commands are clear.”

“Which implies that some aren’t. Okay. Now, I think you said that it doesn’t allow for confusion—confusion is no excuse for not following orders. But it seems to give you at least a little time between being given an order and being punished for not obeying it. You were able to tell me that it was _going_ to punish you before it actually had, so I had the chance to stop it. So you can ask for clarification, if you do it quickly enough?”

Nod.

“Do you know how long before the punishment begins?”

Nod, with a hint of a shrug: _More or less_.

“And the collar generally lets you know how much time you’ve got and, thus, how fast it’s running out. And it lets you know if you’re behaving or misbehaving—acting in a way that is ‘unbecoming’ to a slave.”

Another nod.

“Which includes, let’s see… disobeying orders or defying the collar’s demands, obviously enough. Finding fault with the master’s orders, even if they’re stupid or contradictory. Mentioning your preferences or opinions, even when asked; showing any kind of attitude other than abject servitude… tending to your own needs instead of waiting on your master’s whims… oh, and walking, talking, daring to look me in the eye, and being idle.

“Did I miss anything? Probably. Point is, there’s a lot of ways you could run the timer out faster than normal, and if we assume that I _want_ you to be able to walk around and to converse with me like an actual human being, and not constantly be under the threat of Supplication Mode, then we’re going to need to charge your meter even more than normal.”

Whatever Loki might think of that assertion—and whether he trusts Tony to be telling the truth about his preferences—his reply is merely a nod.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's all I can manage in September. By this time you're reading this, Creepyfest will likely already have begun, and I'll be trying to get multiple seasonal fics (and possibly some other things) uploaded to start the celebration off right.
> 
> Doesn't mean I won't procrastinate again and end up writing another chapter or two of this piece, but I really need to focus on my creepier fare. If you like suspense and/or horror, stay tuned!


	9. Discussing Options

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“The things you can do to earn time… I’m trying to figure it out, but I’m not doing that fast enough. And I don't want to hurt you, or frighten you, or humiliate you, none of that, but I’m gonna make a huge leap here, and guess that those categories offer the most efficient ways to charge the collar. If it comes down to it, if that’s what we have to do to make this manageable—”_
> 
> _“I assure you, I have been through much worse.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My chart for progress on my projects (make a hash mark for each session devoted to it) currently looks like this:
> 
>   * Major Creepyfest Projects:
>   * Minor Creepyfest Projects: / / /
>   * Tertiary Creepyfest Projects:
>   * Other Media:
>   * Loki Slavefics: / / / / / / / / /
> 
> You might conclude that I've been spending way more time on the fic that doesn't count for Creepyfest. You'd be right.
> 
> But a lot of people are enjoying this, so I'm sure they'll be happy to see an update, and at some point you just gotta accept that the Muse is leading you in a different direction. I just hope that I can focus enough to get the major Creepyfest projects updated as well; they're going kinda slow, and having a side project like this taking up so many of my productive hours is not helping :P

“So, we’ve got a useful list of things to avoid,” Tony says, getting ready to move his setup to the other side of Loki. Then he thinks better of that, and relaxes back into the chair. “Turn around so your other side is toward me.” Might as well bank up a little extra time.

As Loki gingerly turns in place, keeping his bruised knees on the doubled-up towels, Tony recalls another thing to clarify: “Oh, and it punished you for flipping me off, not for trying to communicate, right?”

“A slave must not be disrespectful to his betters,” Loki confirms, settling into his new position, eyes still downcast, hands on his thighs. With the shorter hair and slumped shoulders, he suddenly looks very young… and very tired.

“Is that why it zapped you for laughing when I joked about Thor?”

Loki _glowers_—the first strong emotion Tony has seen from him since his arrival. But it quickly fades, smoothing out to a more placid expression. Because, of course, Loki can’t afford to indulge in expressing his true feelings.

_Why the hell are you so calm about this?_

_It is not my place to get upset, or to let such unpleasing emotions disturb the quiet of my master_.

When Loki speaks, it’s nearly monotone: “I’ve spent a thousand years being reminded, in a thousand humiliating ways, that the Crown Prince of Asgard is everything I could never hope to be. I suppose it’s fitting that the collar enforces that awareness; I never did learn my lesson any other way.”

Emotional cues or no, there’s a quiet despondency to the wording.

Uncomfortably reminded of his own childhood, and that same sense of never being able to measure up, Tony pushes aside a lifetime of issues that they can’t deal with right now. Bringing his focus back to the task at hand, he starts to get to work on Loki’s wounds.

“No disrespect. Right. Okay. So we know what _not_ to do. Let’s talk about the things you can do to _earn_ time.” He dabs on a little more Iodosorb gel and hunts for the right size bandage. “As I understand it, we need to find some orders that you can follow willingly and without resistance, and that are also useful to me—not pointless busywork, because that’s less efficient at banking time. And we’ll need a variety of tasks, because of the diminishing returns thing.”

Loki nods.

“Now, the ‘good slave behavior’—keep your eyes averted, stay on your knees, avoid unnecessary speech, take care of your needs in private—that doesn’t bank time, it just keeps your time from running down faster than it has to.”

_Yes_.

“For actually earning more free time, you can follow my orders, and could help with cleaning, gardening, crafting, cooking, stuff like that. Or help me bathe and get dressed, yeah?”

_Yes_.

“And I’m assuming that all the stuff that unlocks you—humiliation, fear, pain, sex, and… what was the other thing… stress positions?—they all count. I mean, we can use those categories to bank additional time, right?” Uneasy as it makes him, it would be stupid to overlook any of the possibilities.

Loki nods again, not giving any obvious reaction to the idea.

“And since we’ve established that the guy who created these collars is a sadist who wants the slave to be thoroughly beaten down, I’m gonna make a huge leap here, and guess that those categories offer the most efficient ways to charge the collar. Hurt you, humiliate you, show you your place. Correct?”

Loki starts to nod, then gets caught up in another coughing jag. Through the coughs, he manages to wheeze out a pained “_Yes_.”

As Loki fights to quiet his lungs, he bends double, pulling loose some of the bandages. Tony makes a mental note to adjust his technique so they’ve got more room to expand.

When, finally, Loki’s breathing returns to a shaky normal, he straightens up to the kneeling position, but heavily; his exhaustion is palpable, as if the reserves of strength that have kept him running are beginning to run out.

The obvious solution would be a good night’s rest. Probably been a while since he’s been allowed that luxury. But the collar… would it even let him sleep? Would it punish him if he tried?

Does sleep come out of his ‘paycheck’?

“Hey,” Tony blurts out, “how much time you got saved up?”

“Seven minutes, forty-one seconds,” Loki answers.

It’s been… what? Well over ten minutes since Loki was able to kneel up again. Probably not twenty, but keeping track of time has never been one of Tony’s better skills (that’s what machines are for). Maybe three quarters of the bandaging is done, so at this rate he might just get Loki up to ten minutes’ reprieve before this task runs out.

And then what? If they haven’t yet been able to rack up even an hour’s free time, how are they possibly going to manage six or eight hours a night, purely to spend on basics like sleep? Loki’s practically dead on his feet; Tony can’t see him spending a few hours cleaning house or gardening, or any of the other chores, let alone if he’s trying to maximize effectiveness by crawling around on his knees.

Tony _could_ see Loki working until he passes out, and then getting zapped by the collar for not being strong enough to keep going.

Maybe they’ll _have_ to use the more ‘efficient’ methods. But surely Loki’s been through enough pain, enough fear. Enough humiliation. Sex is obviously off the table. And would he even have the strength to hold a stress position long enough to do any good?

Tony almost runs his hands through his hair, then remembers that he’s got gloves on and they’re coated in Loki’s blood and lymph and Iodosorb gel.

Ugh.

He swaps out gloves, and gets back to work on the rest of Loki’s wounds. Doctors have to make hard calls sometimes, right? Make things worse, in order to make them better. Is he going to have to do something like that with Loki?

“Hey, um, those… um.” Backtrack. Figure out what you really want to know. “You said that you’d prefer to be ‘active and able to speak,’ rather than stuck in supplication pose all the time and unable to make a sound.”

Loki nods.

“And, um… does sleep come out of the time you’ve banked?”

Another nod. Tony wishes he could see Loki’s expression, but it’s probably still carefully blank.

“I thought so. You obviously need sleep. Soon. The thing is, I’m having trouble figuring out a way to bank enough time for you to get even a proper nap.”

“I am… able to keep going, for a while yet. My physiology is not as weak as that of humans.” As soon as he’s said it, he jerks with a gasp that starts him coughing again.

“What the hell was that about?” Tony asks, failing to see anything improper in Loki’s statement.

“I inadvertently insulted you, Master,” Loki replies, in between coughs. “My apologies.”

“Great. How much did you lose there?”

“Just over three minutes. I have five minutes and eighteen seconds remaining.”

“Fuck.” Every little misstep sets them back… it’s like swimming against a rip current. Need to head sideways just to escape before you can swim back to shore.

Sighing heavily, Tony tries to arrange multiple patches of gauze over a particularly bad spot with no intact skin nearby. “Look, I don’t know that much about Asgardian physiology, but I know that bullets bounce right off you, and I remember you shrugging off attacks and explosions and everything short of a Hulk attack. And even that, you were on your feet just an hour later, tossing snark around like it was no big deal. So whatever happened to you to leave you in this state, it was pretty bad, yeah?”

Loki shrugs, trembling just slightly.

“And you’ve clearly been starved, and I don’t even know what’s up with your lungs—I didn’t think you guys could even get sick. But then, I didn’t think you could scar, either.”

Loki huffs. “We’re gods; we _don’t_ get sick.” He jolts again, probably punished for that little hint of pride.

“Yeah, well,” Tony rejoins, “you’re coughing enough.”

“My lungs are trying to get rid of—” He cuts himself short, fighting off more spasms.

_Forced underwater, out of air_—

“Master?”

Tony blinks; Loki has turned to look at him, concern in his furrowed brows. He’s not looking up, not meeting his eyes, but—

The gems are purple again.

What the hell?

Closing his eyes, Tony tries to get his breathing under control, and reason this out. Loki hasn’t done anything new—has he? It’s not Restricted Mode, or he wouldn’t be able to kneel up, to speak… but he hasn’t banked additional time. Or… maybe he did?

After a couple more deep breaths, Tony gets enough air to ask, “How much time?”

“Two minutes, eight seconds.”

Not a new stage, then. But what…?

As Tony watches, the gems fade back down to blue. Very, very faint, and growing fainter.

Because Loki’s almost out of time.

“Get back to your kneeling position,” Tony blurts out, unable to think of anything useful besides continuing to bandage him up; at least that was banking a _little_ time. “And try not to move while I work on your back.” They’ll have to work out the purple thing later; the less Loki talks right now, the better. Probably.

After getting a fresh pair of gloves on, he gets back to work on the wounds, fixing up the ones that came open.

They’d been discussing Loki’s physical condition, right. And his need for sleep.

“So, the thing is,” Tony says, “when you’re sick or injured, you need to spend more time asleep. That’s when the body does the most healing. At least, that’s true of humans; is it true of you guys as well?”

After a moment’s hesitation, Loki nods.

“So even if you _can_ keep going, it’s best that we find some way for you to sleep for at least a few hours. And I’d like to send you to bed with enough time banked that you still have some left over when you wake up. No more Supplication Mode, because, as I said, that thing is bullshit.”

“I wouldn’t presume to disagree with you,” Loki says, the slightest hint of amusement in his tone.

“…You know, that reminds me. All these weird things you’ve been saying… calling me ‘master’, complimenting me, affirming a slave’s duties, minimizing your own worth… apologizing for something that wasn’t your fault, abasing yourself, offering your services… are those ways to bank time, or to avoid penalty, or what?”

“Complicated,” Loki returns.

“Okay, we can work that out later. Trying to minimize the talking right now. Ugh, this is frustrating,” Tony grumbles, while squeezing more Iodosorb onto Loki’s back. “Your head is full of vital information and I can’t get it out of you fast enough to _help_ you.”

“Master is magnanimous,” Loki says softly. “Going to this much effort to help an enemy and a slave.”

“Yeah, well, call me a progressive for thinking that slavery died, oh, a hundred and fifty years ago. At least in theory. And it’s been over two hundred years since we said no to ‘cruel and unusual punishment’.” He smooths down another bandage, and pauses. “As to whether you’re my enemy… guess that’s up to you, now. You try to hurt people, I will cut you down to size. But this? This is torture. I don’t accept that. Not now, not ever. So we’re going to find a way to make it stop.”

For a while, there is silence between them, broken only by occasional coughing spells, as Tony works and Loki, for the most part, holds statue-still but for his breathing.

When there’s only a couple more wounds left to deal with (on Loki’s back, at least), Tony asks, “How long?”

“Six minutes, thirty-five seconds.”

Tony closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

“So you’ve been here, what, two or three hours, tops. And we’ve managed to get you up to five or ten minutes of free time. It’s… it’s not enough. And I’m trying to figure it out, but I’m not doing that fast enough; we’re low on options. I don’t want to hurt you, or frighten you, or humiliate you, none of that, but… if it comes down to it, if that’s what we have to do to make this manageable—at least in the short term, until I can come up with something better—would you be okay with me ordering you to do things from, from the ‘unlocking’ list?”

Again, there’s a moment’s hesitation, as Tony continues placing bandages and Loki apparently considers his answer.

At length, Loki takes a deep breath. “I am your property now, Master, and yours to command. It is natural for you to make use of me. I understand that these things offend your sensibilities, but I am not frightened or troubled by the thought of what you might do to me. I assure you,” he adds, fighting back more coughs, “I have been through… much worse.”

“Not the most comforting thought,” Tony says, finishing up the last bandage. “Look, I know you don’t have a lot of choice here, and just telling me your preferences is running down the clock, but… I want to respect your decisions about your own body, and give you as much choice as I can. So… let’s get some basics down. Which categories would you find least objectionable?”

“I can bear any of it,” Loki rejoins. “Being hurt or humiliated or scared, giving my body over to feed your lusts or your merriment or your darker impulses, it is all the same to me; I have no preferences.”

“Is that more slave-speak?”

“What is the point of asking me such questions if you will not believe the answers?”

“All right, fine. For now. Are there… any specific commands that you would like me to _avoid_?”

More hesitation. Then: “I would like to be able to breathe.”

And Tony’s _right back in Afghanistan, gasping for breath each time he’s pulled from the water_—

Loki’s voice pulls him out again: “Master? Can I help?”

Pulling in chlorine-scented air, Tony trembles, and tries to focus on something besides the memories. Like… Loki’s collar, which is red-purple again, slowly fading until it turns blue.

“Wait. It’s…” _Breathe_. “Is the collar reacting to _me_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** PTSD flashbacks that lead to symptoms of panic (not as strong as previous depictions in this fic).
> 
> Discussion of using the humiliation list (pain, fear, sexual contact), with the growing awareness that it might be necessary to go there. Given the circumstances, any sexual contact between them would be (at minimum) Dubious Consent, and Tony currently believes it would amount to rape.


	10. Competing Theories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor had told him, once, that Loki’s illusions could fool the eyes and the ears but not the hands—that touching his illusions made them fade away. That’s different from, what did he call it, _glamours_, which is making a person or object look like something else; touch doesn’t destroy those. But if Loki had made himself look like Thor, then it would have been obvious from a touch that the image (big, buff, sturdy) didn’t match the reality (tall, slim, wiry).
> 
> And Thor had left before Tony could even poke him, or pat him on the arm.
> 
> But the wounds are real. Tony _touched_ them. He saw Loki flinch. The flinch could be faked, the pain could be faked, but the wounds… Tony just spent an hour doing first aid on Loki’s back, he _knows_ those wounds are real.
> 
> And if the wounds are real, then it’s not unreasonable to think that the rest might be real. That Loki’s really here, he’s really hurt, he’s trapped and in need of help. And Tony’s the only one who can help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay; this chapter has, for some reason, been a _bear_ to write. I've been batting my head against it for a couple of months now, off and on, while flitting about between other projects. I've had to cut sections repeatedly, and I'm not entirely satisfied with how this turned out, but it's still an update and necessary to get to the next part of the action, so here we are.
> 
> I still hope to get my Yearly Retrospective out before the end of the month, though that's getting here right quick and my ability to focus on that particular entry is... impaired. Really, my ability to focus on _anything_ right now is somewhat impaired, partly because the main non-fic project I've been working on is being so frustrating that it's taking up a good portion of my brain power even when I'm not working on it. That, and I've recently gotten back into [Recettear](https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/1057676), which is fun and a good way to turn off my brain for a while (I do seem to need some [abnegation](https://youtu.be/uepAJ-rqJKA?t=447) at the moment), but also taking up a chunk of time that I could presumably be using to write with.
> 
> Ah well -- gotta stop and sharpen the saw now and then, right? If I've taken any valuable lessons away from playing The Sims, it's that fun and rest are not optional luxuries in life, but vital needs that can be ignored for a short time but, when left unfilled, cast a negative effect across everything else you might be trying to accomplish.
> 
> Anyway! Here's the latest chapter (mostly minus Loki, but with the addition of JARVIS!). Enjoy!
> 
> ETA: Whoops! Forgot to add the latest 'inspired by': [Tabula rasa](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7308373/chapters/16598830) by boleyn13. It's not a Slavefic, but an Amnesia fic, wherein the characters are not sure whether or not Loki is faking it. There's a lot of debate and a lot of "but Loki is a good enough actor to pull this off" and "but what if this is a chance to get to know him as a normal person instead of a villain?" and such. Quite intriguing.

As the gems on the collar turn fully blue, Tony takes a little inventory of how he feels; it’s a technique he had to train himself to follow, to not ignore the details of what he’s going through. Physical: heart rate up, breathing up, though both are still pretty close to normal. Not sweaty or shaky, so the episode wasn’t all that strong. He’s still got control of his breath. Okay.

Emotional: not feeling scared _right now_. He knows enough—when he’s this close to the edge—to steer clear of the trigger, try not to focus on it.

Of course, if he’s going to analyze those colors, he might need to do just that.

And if that thing’s reacting to fear… well, getting back into a fear state is going to be that much harder (and less controllable) if he’s let himself calm down first.

…Damn it.

“Was that… did the collar hurt you? Just… right after you said that you wanted to, to breathe?”

Loki nods, brows drawn together. “I… disturbed you. The collar made me aware of my misstep.”

“That wasn’t—” Okay, yes, disturbing—understatement. How much information did the collar actually convey? If Loki didn’t realize… okay, Tony was definitely not going to let him know just how badly he could affect Tony with just a few words, a few ideas.

Or that would have been his answer a couple of hours ago. By now, this has become potentially crucial information, and not something he can easily gain without letting Loki know the details of what he’s trying to figure out.

Or… can he?

He’s got JARVIS. JARVIS can observe, record, give him data even if he’s not in the room. So it depends on how much he can trigger Loki’s collar without Loki being aware of the effect. Right?

“All right, we’re going into the house,” Tony says, more decisive than he feels. “Pick up the supplies, put them in the bag, and bring them with you.” Casting about for something else to keep Loki busy for a while—because he needs a moment or two to gather himself, and a few minutes to talk to JARVIS and plan out their next move—he sees nothing particularly useful: pool, lounge chairs, giant umbrella. Scenery.

“When you get to the door, knock three times and then wait attentively,” he offers, feebly. “I, um, I’ll come get you when I’m ready.”

It doesn’t count as fleeing if you’ve just asked the guy to follow you, right?

God, he came to Malibu to get _away from_ this sort of thing.

Once out of the sun, Tony tosses his gloves into a trash can before stumbling his way to a chair and collapsing, aware that he is trembling, and wondering what color Loki’s gems might be now. How far the effect works.

“JARVIS?” he asks, before he can think better of it.

“I’m here, sir.”

“Loki, um… I think his c-collar might be reacting to my emotional state. I need to test that before… before I hurt him again without meaning to. So I need to”—he swallows—“get scared. Deliberately.”

After a moment of silence, JARVIS opines, “This course of action seems likely to trigger an anxiety attack.”

“I _know_,” Tony returns, too quickly, and rubs his hands over his face. “I might need you to talk me down, after… after we’ve got the data we need. And, uh, I might need to, I mean, he might need to be involved.”

“Sir?”

“I need to figure out if he’s the cause of the effect, or if it’s me. If me just getting scared is enough to trigger it. If there’s a difference between the two effects.” What else? _Think_. “Keep track of the color—the gems on his collar. Match the color and, and brightness, to my emotional state. To breathing, heart rate, whatever patterns you can see. That’s the point of this test. And, uh, while you’re at it, keep track of how the gems correlate with Loki’s status as well.”

“Very good, sir.”

“And—” Wait. “Actually, we’ll need to test another thing first. See if you can give him commands as my proxy.”

A brief electronic hum fills the air—JARVIS had once asked about humanity’s use of ‘hmm’ and found his own way to mimic it. “What manner of commands would you like me to attempt?”

Hesitating, Tony focuses on his breathing. “Um… okay. Can’t be anything that the collar might get in the way of. Uh, have you—you caught the stuff we’ve been talking about, right?”

“I did pick up on your conversation, yes. I believe I understand the limitations we must work around.”

“Okay, so, I’ll leave the room—after I command him to follow your orders—and you can tell him to, um… to lay out the supplies that are in the bag… just put them on the table, in a neat order. And then put the fruit away, if… I think there’s fruit there, I grabbed some and didn’t have him eat it, there should be. How fast am I breathing, JARV—?”

“You are doing fine, sir. Twenty-three breaths per minute. It is slightly higher than the normal range for an adult, which is between twelve and twenty breaths per minute. If you focus, I believe you can bring your breathing rate down to a normal range.”

“So I just _feel_ more panicky than I am. I can work with that. Okay.” God, he wants to just step away from the situation for a bit, get his legs back under him—but that’s an option that Loki doesn’t have, and Tony needs to know, before it becomes an issue, whether his nightmares are likely to hurt the guy, and whether there’s anything they can do to fix that.

Even if it means knocking Tony out so hard that he _can’t_ dream.

He’s got the means to do that—a prescription that Pepper filled for him, that he never wanted to use. It’s recent enough. Probably effective. But he hates being that much out of control, and the thought of knocking himself out with _Loki_ in the house is… not contributing to his overall sense of being in control, because, again, it’s not like he designed his vacation home with a jail cell, let alone one capable of confining a _god_. And maybe Loki is restrained, maybe he’s not, maybe it’s all just a trick and the moment Tony lets down his guard—

It can’t be just a trick. Can it? Thor’s the one who dropped him off, and of course he can trust _Thor_.

But then… Loki can make illusions.

_Really good_ illusions. He can fool eyes, ears, cameras, and microphones. Make himself invisible and inaudible, sneak in anywhere he likes. Make it look like he’s in a place that he’s not. Change his outfit on the fly—Tony was never sure if that was an illusion or if Loki’s able to change in and out of his armor at will.

And, while they’ve never caught it on tape, apparently Loki can also make himself look like other people. Like Thor, for example. That, or make an _illusion_ that looks like Thor.

Thor had told him, once, that Loki’s illusions could fool the eyes and the ears but not the hands—that touching his illusions made them fade away. That’s different from, what did he call it, _glamours_, which is making a person or object look like something else; touch doesn’t destroy those. But if Loki had made himself look like Thor, then it would have been obvious from a touch that the image (big, buff, sturdy) didn’t match the reality (tall, slim, wiry).

And Thor had left before Tony could even poke him, or pat him on the arm.

But it can’t be all fake… can it? Would Loki humiliate himself that much, just to… to what? To hide, maybe, in the last place anyone would look for him? Or to get revenge? To worm his way under Tony’s skin and…

Tony tugs on his collar, wondering if his breathing has just sped up _again_, but not wanting to ask about it.

The problem. Focus on the _problem_, on the thing he can _figure out_, can solve.

What does he know to be real?

The letter and the control for the collar, those were real. Are real—he could probably go retrieve them right now, if he wanted to confirm that. _Those_, he touched, so they can’t be illusions.

Thinking back, Tony can’t recall if Thor actually touched him while handing them over. Maybe he just dropped them into Tony’s hand; Tony was a bit distracted at the time. But… if Thor had been an illusion, then he couldn’t have carried physical objects… right?

Can Loki move objects with his mind? Telekinesis? There are mutants who can do that, and a ‘master of magic’ could probably do that as well. Moving them along with his illusion, that’d take a lot of fine control, but Loki’s been practicing his powers for, what, hundreds of years? He’s had the time to develop that level of control.

So maybe Thor _wasn’t_ real.

Is there anything else that’s real? Anything at all, other than Loki being real enough to lick his feet?

The wounds are real. Tony _touched_ them. He saw Loki flinch. The flinch could be faked, the pain could be faked, but the wounds… Tony just spent an hour doing first aid on Loki’s back, he _knows_ those wounds are real.

Of course, Loki could have harmed himself as part of some larger plan. Which is… disturbingly easy to picture, actually. If he’s devious enough—or desperate enough—to do that to himself…

Tony lolls his head back against the chair with a groan, rubbing his temples and trying to sort through the two realities jostling each other inside his brain.

If Loki is deceiving him—if the collar’s not real, if he’s not really forced to obey Tony’s commands, if he could leave at any time—then Tony needs to stay on guard, ready to fight back when Loki finally makes his move. And he needs to find a way to contain him.

But if the wounds are real, then it’s not unreasonable to think that the rest might be real. That Loki’s really here, he’s really hurt, he’s trapped and in need of help. That he’ll probably be this way for a long time.

_Fight or help. Protect or destroy. Stay skeptical or believe. Keep it secret or go to his allies._ It’s a jumble of priorities in his mind, and it’s giving him a massive headache. (Cognitive dissonance has always been a pain, but rarely to this degree.)

If Loki’s trying to trick him, and Tony buys into it, then Loki could conceivably do some very bad things to the world. Calling SHIELD would be the responsible thing to do.

But if Loki’s honestly hurting, and Tony decides not to care… he’s not sure he could live with himself, if paranoia made him turn his back on someone in this much need. Calling SHIELD would be turning a helpless prisoner over to an uncaring jailer (possibly worse), and that’s not any better than sending him back to the people who did this to him.

“Sir?” JARVIS asks, in that long-suffering tone he takes when he’s tried to get Tony’s attention a few times and Tony’s been too stuck in his own brain to actually respond.

“What?” Tony asks, distracted by thoughts of tests he could use to try to determine if Loki’s truly captive, and how negatively Loki might react if he realizes he’s been found out.

“Mr. Odinson has been waiting at the door.”

Right. Tony’s not even sure if Loki’s clock is winding up or winding down—is ‘wait attentively’ enough to earn Loki more time? Even if that’s the case, it’s likely pretty slow, and Tony was… trying to figure out how to get him charged enough to even take a nap. Which the man obviously needs.

“Okay,” Tony says, as if he hadn’t just zoned out of the conversation for who knows how long. “So, if it turns out that you _can_ give him commands, I guess we need to figure out if there are any limitations on that. Figure out whether you can release him from the supplication pose. Because if that works, then at least he won’t have to wait for me whenever his timer runs out.”

“I shall do my best, sir.”

“I’ll, um, I’ll get him set up here and then go”—hide—“study the security feeds. All right?”

“You will order him to follow my orders, and then leave the room. I shall order him to lay out the supplies in an orderly fashion on the table, and then to put the fruit away. I shall also ask him to keep me apprised of the amount of time left on his collar. From there, we should be able to determine our next move.”

“You got it,” Tony says, his chest feeling tight.

“Sir, if you still intend to frighten yourself as a test, I would suggest that you move Loki to a location where I can observe the state of the gems on his collar. I am unsure how much longer you can maintain such an elevated heart rate before triggering an actual anxiety attack.”

“Right. Okay. Great,” Tony says, trying to suck in enough air to sustain him for the moment. Gotta just do it, right? Gotta get it done. A few more steps, that’s all.

Step one: Answer the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Content Warnings:** Tony comes perilously close to a panic attack (even if he and JARVIS are still calling them "anxiety attacks").
> 
> Tony's been so caught up in the surface level of the situation -- dealing with what's right in front of him -- that this is the first time he's been able to step back and examine the possibility that Loki is manipulating him, and isn't really collared. This creates a great deal of cognitive dissonance (the brain trying to deal with contradictory situations all at once), and it's no fun for him. I know firsthand that cognitive dissonance coupled with real-life consequences can be _physically painful_, although mostly what it does to Tony is give him a massive headache.
> 
> Tony considers the use of prescription sleeping pills. He also considers the possibility that Loki has harmed _himself_ as part of some larger manipulation ploy.


End file.
